bullseye Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 GUY RULES > At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' > side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) > We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the > rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note... these are > all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! > 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. > We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about > you leaving it down. > 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. > 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. > 1. Crying is blackmail. > 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: > Subtle hints do not work! > Strong hints do not work! > Obvious hints do not work! > Just say it! > 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. > 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's > what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. > 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. > 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In > fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days. > 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act > like soap opera guys. > 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. > 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the > ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. > 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it > done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it > yourself. > 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during > commercials. > 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we. > 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, > for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a Vegetable. We > have no idea what the hell mauve is. > 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. > 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like > nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the > hassle. > 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer > you don't want to hear. > 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is > fine...Really. > 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to > discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks. > 1. You have enough clothes. > 1. You have too many shoes. > 1. I am in shape. Round is a shape. > 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I probably will have to sleep on the couch > tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's sort of like camping. > Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh. > Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrsblend Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 Cute! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortkat5 Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 hilarious - especially #1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nekokaburi Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 which # 1? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tanyalover Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 oh god Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shortkat5 Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 which # 1?lol i was being sarcastic dear Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladyshady Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 cutei was afraid to open at first because i thought it said "guys rule!" or "gay rules" or something lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nekokaburi Posted November 16 Report Share Posted November 16 lol i was being sarcastic dearso was i Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
koky Posted November 17 Report Share Posted November 17 best thread ever !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lmg Posted November 17 Report Share Posted November 17 good post, some of those are great. THink im gonna fwd it to my gf. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ezroller Posted November 17 Report Share Posted November 17 lol good idea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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