digitalphoenix Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 I've been attending Ultra for the past 4 years in a row,(ULTRA 2 was my first) which was a pretty good experienceregardless of all the sand (it was @ Sobe) & not knowing when DJ's were playing. They've come a long way! However, there are things that thru the years have helped meenjoy my experience... and I hereby share these tips with you.Beware #1: the big shirtless guy with the fluffy jester's hat. Ask yourself - how's this guy keeping cool? He's wearing the hat equivalent of a faux fur jacket - how's all that heat from his head escaping? Answer: his big, sweaty body. To help facilitate the loss of heat his covered head ain't losing, the dude has taken off his shirt. He is now a giant walking sweat globule. Avoid him or suffer the slime.Beware #2: the hotdog stand.True, lots of clubbers don't seek out much food at festivals, but if you've been chugging back the UDLs you might be tempted to line that stomach. The problem with eating a hotdog is that it's not going to be lining anything - other than the pavement - for long. You'll catch some kind of meat-borne disease from it, become deathly ill, your body will lose all its contents one way or another and your festival experience will be limited mainly to the St John's Ambulance tent or the port-a-loo.Hot chips or corn carry far less deadly bacteria. Beware #3: the toilet line.This is mainly a chick problem due to the fact that most of the architects for big venues are men and they don't care if girls take longer to pee and do so more often than guys. The only thing you can do is predict when you will need to go and start lining up 20 minutes in advance. If you're all happy and talkative, strong, life-long friendships can be formed in the toilet queue, but if you're not - and a bursting bladder can affect one's mood negatively, believe it or not - the only friend you're going to make is white and made out of porcelain. Beware #4: the ATMSaving must have been so much simpler before ATMs. You just went home when you ran out of money. Nowadays you can access all the money you own and some you don't at any time of the day or night with just one little card. Wow, what an amazing concept at 12am after several thousand beers.As festival lore states:no matter how much cash you have on you at the start of the festival - whether it's $5 or $5 million - none of it will be left by midnight. Lucky you've got your ATM card, huh!Beware #5: festival friendsMost of the time, friends are valuable, enjoyable, amazing things. Sometimes, like at festivals, you just have to let them go. In order to enjoy a festival the way God intended, don't put your friends' wishes first, ever. If you want to see a band/DJ no one else wants to see, don't miss out cos you need someone there to hold your hand through the whole thing. Separating from your friends for awhile is almost like an adventure guarantee, and, as soon as you start feeling traumatised without them, hang out in the toilet queue. You'll either see them there or make some new ones. Enjoy!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrsblend Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djfrosty Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 Note to self...don't go to Ultra this year.Never been to Ultra nor do I want to go. Nothing worse than having to wait to pee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digital7 Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deephousemann Posted January 27 Report Share Posted January 27 I'm sitting here at the office and laughing like a dumb ass. LOL Number 3, 4 and 5 are very true. Actually number 4 applies to everynight you go out to party. When ya think your running low on flow, long and behold... bust out your ATM CARD ! Didn't transfer enough money from one account into your good ole weekend checking account before you left your house? You have the option to withdrawal from your savings ! And who cares about saving when your drunk or what ever recreational party favors you use, you just think, Hell, I'll replenish my account on pay day ! LOLOLFunny thread Digital! LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digitalphoenix Posted March 22 Author Report Share Posted March 22 6) Take sunblock with you. No really. If your pasty white ass hasnt seen the light in years, and chances are, if you're from upnorth- it's been eons... Do yourself a favor and take sunblock or otherwise you will end up like the good ol' boys from Texas: With a sunburn that will make the lobsters in the tank of the nearby restaturant, jealous enuff to question why you're not in there with them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tranzwhore Posted March 23 Report Share Posted March 23 Note to self...don't go to Ultra this year.Never been to Ultra nor do I want to go. Nothing worse than having to wait to pee aren't you a dude? what do you have to wait for? save a bush! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sotuchick Posted March 23 Report Share Posted March 23 Ultra is gonna be a CELEBRATION!!!!I hope to see some of you there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digitalphoenix Posted March 23 Author Report Share Posted March 23 Amendment to #3 for the wifeys & for the girls...BRING TOILET PAPER... Orisha 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funketeer Posted March 23 Report Share Posted March 23 Beware #5: festival friendsMost of the time, friends are valuable, enjoyable, amazing things. Sometimes, like at festivals, you just have to let them go. In order to enjoy a festival the way God intended, don't put your friends' wishes first, ever. so fucking true... :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orisha Posted March 24 Report Share Posted March 24 I'm not taking acid this year. Acid and HUGE crowds is too overwhelming for mejust my $.02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.