ATTN: Uncool Staten Island guys

[oldtimer]

The top twelve things you need to do to become a cool Staten Island guy:

12.You must be tan all year around. It is better to be orange then pale white. Also it helps cover up all the back acne caused from steroid use.

11. You must Spike your hair and have pics for sideburns. The more hair gel the better. Usually half of them are going bald from years of hair gel abuse, but the girls still love it.

10. You must have a cool nickname. Even when your supposedly older and more mature, people must still call you by your nickname. The nickname should be attached to something that makes you cool. Joey Ballz, Vinny Botz, or Johhny Blaze are a few.

9. You or a family memeber must have a city job. If you get pulled over you show a PBA card. If you park in front of a hydrant, you have a Fire Dept. sticker. If you got to dump garbage, someone works sanitation, no problem.

8. You must dress just like every other S.I. guy. A North Face jacket is a must. Black Armani T shirts, wifebeaters, G-Unit hoodies, straight brim hats, throwback jerseys, sleeveless fila shirts, diesel jeans, abercrombie half ripped/spraypainted jeans, nike airmax, Curve cologne, and of course oversized earing.

7. You have to announce everything you do, whether in an away message, or on Myspace. Everyone has to know where you go and who you hang out with. You will even go as far as getting your pictures on nitelife internet sites.

6. Pictures are important. You should have some slutty girls in the pictures, along with your friends. Definately be holding an alchoholic beverage in your pictures and flexing your muscles. Pictures should be taken in a club or a bar.

5. Since you have no excitement in your life, you must drive fast. Usually driving your parents car, under their insurance plan. Tinted windows and Italian flag stickers are great accessories. Tilt the seat as far back as it goes so your slouching, and only drive with one hand. Drive really fast pumping rap, hip hop, or dance and techno music. Everyone need to hear what your listening to. When you drive, dont bother to stop at red lights, and do cut people off. Make sure to yell and scream at people walking the streets just minding their own buisness.

4. Feel free to stare at everyone. This will make you look tough. Whether you are driving down Hylan blvd., or walking around the mall stare at everyone like your hot shit. If you beleive it, maybe they will too. Act tough, but if trouble comes, get on your cell phone and call your 50 other thug friends so you "jump" someone.

3. You must go to the Jersey shore. Djais and Jenks are the hot spots. Take alot of pictures so you can post them on myspace and leave your friends comments. Make sure you have pics of you dancing, and with as many little whores as you can find. Even if you dont know there names, make one up and brag about how much you drank, and who you hooked up with. This will be your weekend from Memorial day to Labor day.

2.Steriods. The only thing that can turn you from 125 pounds in November, to a rock soild 180 in May. You will need to go to the gym, and do look in the mirror every five minuted you are there. These S.I. girls love muscles, and if you dont have them dont dare show up at the Jersey shore. Make sure you never admitting taking steroids to anyone. If anyone asks just say Creotine and egg whites really do work. You might start losing your hair, or get liver cancer but you only live once.

1. And the number 1 thing, always make yourself look cooler than you really are. If you never got into a fight, act tough. Anything you do brag about it. Your job, your friends, blow everything out of proportion. This will fool most people. Walk around like your "the shit" and people will start beleiving it. Do whatever it takes. Act, talk, dress and do everything exactly how the majority does it. There is no time for individualism. If you want to find a little guinea brat for yourself just follow my 12 step process.

[dgmodel]

lol

[elevatedflow]

12.You must be tan all year around. It is better to be orange then pale white.

I know some women from long island who live by these words

11. You must Spike your hair and have pics for sideburns. The more hair gel the better. Usually half of them are going bald from years of hair gel abuse, but the girls still love it.

8. You must dress just like every other S.I. guy. A North Face jacket is a must. Black Armani T shirts, wifebeaters, G-Unit hoodies, straight brim hats, throwback jerseys, sleeveless fila shirts, diesel jeans, abercrombie half ripped/spraypainted jeans, nike airmax, Curve cologne, and of course oversized earing.

It also seems like most asian guys from queens follow these steps as a rule of thumb when dressing

7. You have to announce everything you do, whether in an away message, or on Myspace. Everyone has to know where you go and who you hang out with. You will even go as far as getting your pictures on nitelife internet sites.

Seems like most asian women also believe this is cool

5. Since you have no excitement in your life, you must drive fast. Usually driving your parents car, under their insurance plan. Tinted windows and Italian flag stickers are great accessories. Tilt the seat as far back as it goes so your slouching, and only drive with one hand. Drive really fast pumping rap, hip hop, or dance and techno music. Everyone need to hear what your listening to. When you drive, dont bother to stop at red lights, and do cut people off. Make sure to yell and scream at people walking the streets just minding their own buisness.

Change Italian flag stickers too any spanish speaking country flag stickers and change dance / techno music to Reggeaton, salsa. merengue, bachata and you have all of the bronx and washington heights on any given day

[intoxikated]

hahaha this guy came up to me in a club once and he had on a while muscle tee and about two gallons of hair gel and he was like, "yo yo yo, reppin STA-TEN IS-LAND!! The coolest place in the world.." I just tried to keep myself from cracking up

[Felix_Leiter]

The top twelve things you need to do to become a cool Staten Island guy:

12.You must be tan all year around. It is better to be orange then pale white. Also it helps cover up all the back acne caused from steroid use.

11. You must Spike your hair and have pics for sideburns. The more hair gel the better. Usually half of them are going bald from years of hair gel abuse, but the girls still love it.

10. You must have a cool nickname. Even when your supposedly older and more mature, people must still call you by your nickname. The nickname should be attached to something that makes you cool. Joey Ballz, Vinny Botz, or Johhny Blaze are a few.

9. You or a family memeber must have a city job. If you get pulled over you show a PBA card. If you park in front of a hydrant, you have a Fire Dept. sticker. If you got to dump garbage, someone works sanitation, no problem.

8. You must dress just like every other S.I. guy. A North Face jacket is a must. Black Armani T shirts, wifebeaters, G-Unit hoodies, straight brim hats, throwback jerseys, sleeveless fila shirts, diesel jeans, abercrombie half ripped/spraypainted jeans, nike airmax, Curve cologne, and of course oversized earing.

7. You have to announce everything you do, whether in an away message, or on Myspace. Everyone has to know where you go and who you hang out with. You will even go as far as getting your pictures on nitelife internet sites.

6. Pictures are important. You should have some slutty girls in the pictures, along with your friends. Definately be holding an alchoholic beverage in your pictures and flexing your muscles. Pictures should be taken in a club or a bar.

5. Since you have no excitement in your life, you must drive fast. Usually driving your parents car, under their insurance plan. Tinted windows and Italian flag stickers are great accessories. Tilt the seat as far back as it goes so your slouching, and only drive with one hand. Drive really fast pumping rap, hip hop, or dance and techno music. Everyone need to hear what your listening to. When you drive, dont bother to stop at red lights, and do cut people off. Make sure to yell and scream at people walking the streets just minding their own buisness.

4. Feel free to stare at everyone. This will make you look tough. Whether you are driving down Hylan blvd., or walking around the mall stare at everyone like your hot shit. If you beleive it, maybe they will too. Act tough, but if trouble comes, get on your cell phone and call your 50 other thug friends so you "jump" someone.

3. You must go to the Jersey shore. Djais and Jenks are the hot spots. Take alot of pictures so you can post them on myspace and leave your friends comments. Make sure you have pics of you dancing, and with as many little whores as you can find. Even if you dont know there names, make one up and brag about how much you drank, and who you hooked up with. This will be your weekend from Memorial day to Labor day.

2.Steriods. The only thing that can turn you from 125 pounds in November, to a rock soild 180 in May. You will need to go to the gym, and do look in the mirror every five minuted you are there. These S.I. girls love muscles, and if you dont have them dont dare show up at the Jersey shore. Make sure you never admitting taking steroids to anyone. If anyone asks just say Creotine and egg whites really do work. You might start losing your hair, or get liver cancer but you only live once.

1. And the number 1 thing, always make yourself look cooler than you really are. If you never got into a fight, act tough. Anything you do brag about it. Your job, your friends, blow everything out of proportion. This will fool most people. Walk around like your "the shit" and people will start beleiving it. Do whatever it takes. Act, talk, dress and do everything exactly how the majority does it. There is no time for individualism. If you want to find a little guinea brat for yourself just follow my 12 step process.

for someone who moved to san diego. you sure seem to miss the isle of staten

[oldtimer]

nothng really compares to new york city... san diego is nice and all but im definitely moving back to the city in the next few years..

[JonStephen]

nothng really compares to new york city... san diego is nice and all but im definitely moving back to the city in the next few years..

wait till the summer....your minds gonna so change

[theplant]

So who does the hair gell spikey hair thing. Confessions?

[oldtimer]

wait till the summer....your minds gonna so change

true i was here the last 2 summers and had a blast...

plant used to do the gel thing, no more though

but i do own a north face vest and a mets flat brim hat..

[theplant]

plant used to do the gel thing, no more though

wait till the summer....your hair's gonna so change

[JonStephen]

wait till the summer....your hair's gonna so change

fucker....

my hair started to get bleached out

wait till the summer......your tans gonna so change