muchachamala Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 > > > > 1. Women wear high heels to bed. > > > > 2. Men are never impotent. > > > > 3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory. > > > > 4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her. > > > > 5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm. > > > > 6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men. > > > > 7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob. > > > > 8. Women always orgasm when men do. > > > > 9. A blowjob will always get a women off a speeding ticket. > > 10. All women are noisy fucks. > > 11. People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background. 12. Those tits are real. > > > > 13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. > > > > 14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum. > > > > 15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other (and the girl isn't disgusted!) > > > > 16. Double penetration makes women smile. > > > > 17. Asian men don't exist. > > > > 18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth. > > 19. There's a plot. > > 20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the butt. > > > > 21. Nurses suck patients cocks. > > > > 22. Men always pull out. > > > > 23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking the both of you. > > > > 24. Women never have headaches... or periods. > > > > 25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to "Suck It". > > > > 26. Assholes are clean. > > > > 27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned. > > > > 28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trousers and find a cock there. > > > > 29. Men don't have to beg. > > > > 30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cmb1975 Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 I love this one!!! FUnny as hell!!! ------------------ The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyv Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 12. Those tits are real. You mean they are'nt! ------------------"Smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks."[This message has been edited by tonyv (edited 04-04-2001).] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starcapone Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 funny ass shit...luv these things..keep them cumming... ------------------ * I ain't no joke so you should get a pen, and write yourself a lil' note so you don't forget again *~same shit - different day~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
djmoonshine Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 heh.pretty good... ------------------ life's a ride... pack light...AIM: dELERiUM 540 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest xfactor834 Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 Very true Mucha...very true------------------ Time to roll baby, time to roll. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diezel Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 LOL..I love it.I got one more for you30. When delivering a pizza, a unknown woman will always invite you inside to give you a blow job------------------ What time is it? GAME TIME! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muchachamala Posted April 5 Author Report Share Posted April 5 funny shit right.. i'll def. keep them cuming.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlea Posted April 5 Report Share Posted April 5 LOL!! THIS IS CLASSIC!!Don't forget to add...EVERY MAN IS OVER 8 inches, now that's the biggest myth of PORNO's!!!------------------ People come into your life for reasons not yet known, keep your mind, heart and soul open.AIM: Xxlea77 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clubkat Posted April 6 Report Share Posted April 6 and when after having sex and or giving a blow job...make-up will stay perfectly in place ------------------*F-R-I-S-K-Y* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ancientskewl Posted April 6 Report Share Posted April 6 31) That all men last forever and then keep going, and going, and going...32) That in every session, you hit at least 10 positions without blowing your load. ------------------"Those who know, don't tell. Those who tell, don't know." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diezel Posted April 6 Report Share Posted April 6 33) The pool man will always catch the customer masturbating by the pool, then she will proceed to seduce and f**k the pool man------------------ What time is it? GAME TIME! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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