fierydesire Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 So, I have been single for 8 months now. I think that I have come to the conclusion, that it isn't what it's all cracked up to be. So it was great for a few months, well not the first few (depressed mode:(), so now I am starting to see that being alone isn't so fulfilling. Yeah random hookups are fun, but they die out quick. I mean, you kiss someone and at the time it could mean something, but in the end it is nothing more than a kiss...I can honestly say that, it may be time for me to relax, not hook up as much. But yet one cannot look for love, or search for it. It must come to you or fall into place. I guess just go with the flow. I guess I miss being in love, having that one person I can call just to say hello to or just to hear their voice. I mean what is better than waking up to the one you love and just laying there in dead silence and listening to their heart beat...::sigh:: Oh I am just a sap. I guess I was once a hopeless romantic, and well I am just starting to feel like I want more than just these random, non-meaningful hookups. I want to start liking guys. I mean I don't know but I haven't TRULY liked anyone since my past relationship. I guess I just have a wall up and won't let anyone get inside my world...One last thing, I have been trying (and I think I have been fairly good at it), to enter everything with no expectations. I mean is that the write way to go about it? Do it really pay...to just step into things and take it for how it is? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReginaP Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by fierydesire One last thing, I have been trying (and I think I have been fairly good at it), to enter everything with no expectations. I mean is that the write way to go about it? Do it really pay...to just step into things and take it for how it is? Honestly is there any other way? How can you know what's going to happen at the beginning of a relationship or even after the first time you hook up with someone? Damn we'd make a fortune if we could see the future like that . Expectations put a burden on you and on the other person, giving them something to live up to in a sense...and that's not fair to either party. Definitely just go with the flow and see what happens...no point in stressing about something that might not even be more than "just a hookup." But it's also important to know what you want out of life...it's a cycle, most people go through a period of hooking up before jumping into another serious relationship. Meeting new people and deciding what you want is so much healthier than getting attached to someone else right after dating a person for a long time.Everyone needs time to find themselves and decide what they want...you've got a good head on your shoulders, so trust me when I say the pieces will fall into place Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daemoncel Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 WERD CHICAi hear yai've been single for about 3 months but i haven't hit that i hate being alone thing, but i'm a hopeless romantic, too.. random hookups (well i don't mind those too much, but that's cause i got a penis.. i'm a guy of course)the expression "something meaningful" is an interesting phrase, cause it only really picks up meaning when you are alone, but eventually, we'll all find our "someONE meaningful(s)"the question, which perplexes even the best, is how,i believe you are right, i live by this sentimentstop looking, and eventually they'll pop upwhen? well, don't think about it, cause that means you're unconciously thinking about it~!!!hope things pick up -peace-love-dae Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
echostar Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 see like this is how id look at it........for me at leasti couldnt love someone unless like, i could trust them and like hanging out with them and shit, so once i found someone that i clicked with and was chill to talk to and hang out with or whatever and love would develop over time...does that make any sense or am i just babbling Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silente Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 fiery, I'm completely on the same page. I've been single...god...over a year, and hookups have really lost their appeal. It's to the point where I'm like, 'well...yeah, I guess I could hook up...but there's this really great documentary on sundance...' It's ridiculous. And it's not that I don't want anything - far from it - I just want something that's going to *mean* something to me in the morning. Somebody that when I do wake up and hear them breathing I know it's not a temporary thing.I'm sort of at the beginning of a relationship now that looks like it might be good...I just don't know how to make it real, make it not just about sex. It's been sooooo long....any advice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
echostar Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by silente It's to the point where I'm like, 'well...yeah, I guess I could hook up...but there's this really great documentary on sundance...' It's ridiculous. haha thats so weird cuz im the same exact way...my friend keeps asking me the past few nights why i havent hooked up and im just like, "no motivation" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silente Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by trancend haha thats so weird cuz im the same exact way...my friend keeps asking me the past few nights why i havent hooked up and im just like, "no motivation" Exactly. It just gets kind of repetitive when you don't have the excitement of real emotions behind your actions. There really is a difference between love and lust, you know? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluegirl Posted January 3 Report Share Posted January 3 fiery lets trade places pleasei have been single for this past yearand i accomplished many thingsmy last bf was too possesive and jealous and i am so glad i was able to get rid of himunlike most peoplei hate liking someoneand i was not looking for someonebut it happenedat first i tried to turn awaybut i couldnti think i can finally go with my emotionsmy new years resolutionbut i dont think things are gonna turn out the way i wanted oh well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fierydesire Posted January 3 Author Report Share Posted January 3 Originally posted by silente I'm sort of at the beginning of a relationship now that looks like it might be good...I just don't know how to make it real, make it not just about sex. It's been sooooo long....any advice? Well, hun my only advice to you would be too take it slow...I mean just enjoy each others company. Get to know each other. I mean, it is hard when there is so much sexual lust at first, but there are ways to control it. Believe me when the time is right you both will know it and the sex will be more than wonderful... so just control your hormones and take it slooooowww;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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