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sassa

What to do: Need feedback...

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Well, I just need some constructive advice from people:

I met a guy back home 3 months ago, he and I really hit it off and things were going well, until he was called to take care of business in London. I haven't really seen him in more than a month, and I am one of those people who live by the motto "out of sight, out of mind", or, sorry but if I don't get to spend time with someone I care for, I will lose interest, that's just me.

I met another guy out here recently...from New York, a very nice guy...intelligent, sort of funny, cool....but I don't feel as intrigued or happy as I am with the first guy....he really brought a smile to my face and made me forget things for the time I was with him. This other guy is more like a reliable, nice guy to have around type of person. I bet he'd make a great husband and father, since he seems like the type to be grounded and all, but he doesn't excite me....

How do I go on from here....the first guy's life is full of drama and I am not sure if we are ever going to be together officially...and the second guy...is more of a safety net than anything else. I like him...and I can't forget the other guy at all....although he does piss me off from time to time, ie. forgetting my birthday and shit (stupid female little things we vent about).

Or should I just say fuck you all,and just move on....

I am completely lost...

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Originally posted by sassa

Well, I just need some constructive advice from people:

I met a guy back home 3 months ago, he and I really hit it off and things were going well, until he was called to take care of business in London. I haven't really seen him in more than a month, and I am one of those people who live by the motto "out of sight, out of mind", or, sorry but if I don't get to spend time with someone I care for, I will lose interest, that's just me.

I met another guy out here recently...from New York, a very nice guy...intelligent, sort of funny, cool....but I don't feel as intrigued or happy as I am with the first guy....he really brought a smile to my face and made me forget things for the time I was with him. This other guy is more like a reliable, nice guy to have around type of person. I bet he'd make a great husband and father, since he seems like the type to be grounded and all, but he doesn't excite me....

How do I go on from here....the first guy's life is full of drama and I am not sure if we are ever going to be together officially...and the second guy...is more of a safety net than anything else. I like him...and I can't forget the other guy at all....although he does piss me off from time to time, ie. forgetting my birthday and shit (stupid female little things we vent about).

Or should I just say fuck you all,and just move on....

I am completely lost...

Why even ask the question? You know you're gonna be typical female and choose Contestant A. Or maybe even Fuck contestant A while stringing along contestant B for emotional support. One or the other, you'll still choose the typical female route, so just go with it and stop asking questions. :aright:

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WoW, this soundz like a toughy, but i'll try ;)

It seems like numero uno really gets you goin. Tis a shame that he had to travel away, but that still shouldn't matter. Don't the 2 of you keep contact?

It's tough to tell, b/c numero dos also seems like a good prospect. What i would do is, seeing that #2 is right here right now (and you said you are a "out of sight, out of mind"-type person), i would give this #2 guy a try...

Try things with him, go out n stuff, but keep it in control. If it starts to get hot-and-heavy, and you still have feelings for number one in England, then tell #2. But i don't think you should forego possibilities that are here right now.

(plus, who knows if #1 decides to stay in England :confused:-)

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Originally posted by embodiedhate

Why even ask the question? You know you're gonna be typical female and choose Contestant A. Or maybe even Fuck contestant A while stringing along contestant B for emotional support. One or the other, you'll still choose the typical female route, so just go with it and stop asking questions. :aright:

well, i know this is asking a lot from an insensitive little prick like you, but please don't judge me. i am not a typical female. typical females would probably do the shit you've described above, but i go out of my way to not hurt people, and i will be the one who will probably get called a fucking idiot for helping a blind woman across the street or buying a homeless man a hamburger, i'm not trying to make it seem like i'm perfect. but i don't fuck over guys like that. i'm only asking for some constructive advice, not your stupid, bullshit comments which probably take ages for you to think of. seriously, just chill with the bullshit for once, i know i am a huge bitch on this board too, but i am not a bitch ALL THE DAMN TIME. :bigfinge:

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Originally posted by gmccookny

WoW, this soundz like a toughy, but i'll try ;)

It seems like numero uno really gets you goin. Tis a shame that he had to travel away, but that still shouldn't matter. Don't the 2 of you keep contact?

It's tough to tell, b/c numero dos also seems like a good prospect. What i would do is, seeing that #2 is right here right now (and you said you are a "out of sight, out of mind"-type person), i would give this #2 guy a try...

Try things with him, go out n stuff, but keep it in control. If it starts to get hot-and-heavy, and you still have feelings for number one in England, then tell #2. But i don't think you should forego possibilities that are here right now.

(plus, who knows if #1 decides to stay in England :confused:-)

sounds like good advice, but what bothers me is the inevitable question..."what if?"

What if I go with number one...deal with drama....and I'm full of drama myself so it'd bring a lot of crazy things...(btw, he doesn't play to stay in London, just until he gets his shit together)...and regret not testing out #2?

OR what if I choose #2....then get bored out of my damn mind and wish I never gave up on #1, who I just have to even talk to and my heart thumps faster....

damn decisions....maybe I should just dyke it? guys are so much trouble..........

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Originally posted by sassa

well, i know this is asking a lot from an insensitive little prick like you, but please don't judge me. i am not a typical female. typical females would probably do the shit you've described above, but i go out of my way to not hurt people, and i will be the one who will probably get called a fucking idiot for helping a blind woman across the street or buying a homeless man a hamburger, i'm not trying to make it seem like i'm perfect. but i don't fuck over guys like that. i'm only asking for some constructive advice, not your stupid, bullshit comments which probably take ages for you to think of. seriously, just chill with the bullshit for once, i know i am a huge bitch on this board too, but i am not a bitch ALL THE DAMN TIME. :bigfinge:

If I could have that notarized and have you sign an agreement stating that you'd adhere to what you claim, I would. Sorry, but I just don't buy it, although I do wish you luck in being that good hearted.

Here's why I think you'll be typical, just in case you care: If you didn't want to choose A, You wouldn't have even hesitated to choose contestant B, nor would you have told us that you're torn between the two.

It's all very simple:

Contestant A: Drama and Chaos

Contestant B: Nice and Safe

You're asking us to help you make a decision between poison and innocuous, even though it should be readily apparant that POISON IS BAD FOR YOU!!

I mean, please now..but you know what? And I finally see the deeper subconscious meaning behind your first post..I believe you're looking, subconsciously at least, for someone to validate the bad choice for you, because if you take the law of averages into effect, eventually someone's gonna come out of the woodwork on this circus of a board and tell you to go for it.

You're educated cupcake, or at least you come off as being so. Neither I, nor anyone else should have to tell you NOT TO TOUCH THE HOT STOVE!!

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YEah, believe it or not, i tend to agree w/ embodied here. #2 seems like the right choice right now.

Don't worry about "what if's", SaSs, cuz that type of pondering will get you no where (also, "What if NOT"?)

#2 seems good. Less drama, right here, right now, and a good all-around guy.

Give him a try, b/c then you can at least say you did. And if it doesn't work, it doesn't! Owell, #1 will come back eventually.

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Originally posted by embodiedhate

If I could have that notarized and have you sign an agreement stating that you'd adhere to what you claim, I would. Sorry, but I just don't buy it, although I do wish you luck in being that good hearted.

Here's why I think you'll be typical, just in case you care: If you didn't want to choose A, You wouldn't have even hesitated to choose contestant B, nor would you have told us that you're torn between the two.

It's all very simple:

Contestant A: Drama and Chaos

Contestant B: Nice and Safe

You're asking us to help you make a decision between poison and innocuous, even though it should be readily apparant that POISON IS BAD FOR YOU!!

I mean, please now..but you know what? And I finally see the deeper subconscious meaning behind your first post..I believe you're looking, subconsciously at least, for someone to validate the bad choice for you, because if you take the law of averages into effect, eventually someone's gonna come out of the woodwork on this circus of a board and tell you to go for it.

You're educated cupcake, or at least you come off as being so. Neither I, nor anyone else should have to tell you NOT TO TOUCH THE HOT STOVE!!

i am afraid i cannot notarize that, can only tell you i try to be good with people, but anyways,

you have a point.

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Originally posted by embodiedhate

If I could have that notarized and have you sign an agreement stating that you'd adhere to what you claim, I would. Sorry, but I just don't buy it, although I do wish you luck in being that good hearted.

Here's why I think you'll be typical, just in case you care: If you didn't want to choose A, You wouldn't have even hesitated to choose contestant B, nor would you have told us that you're torn between the two.

It's all very simple:

Contestant A: Drama and Chaos

Contestant B: Nice and Safe

You're asking us to help you make a decision between poison and innocuous, even though it should be readily apparant that POISON IS BAD FOR YOU!!

I mean, please now..but you know what? And I finally see the deeper subconscious meaning behind your first post..I believe you're looking, subconsciously at least, for someone to validate the bad choice for you, because if you take the law of averages into effect, eventually someone's gonna come out of the woodwork on this circus of a board and tell you to go for it.

You're educated cupcake, or at least you come off as being so. Neither I, nor anyone else should have to tell you NOT TO TOUCH THE HOT STOVE!!

there you go, there you go. good analyzation.

and sassa, i guess you´re still young, so i´d go for the FUN and safe the SAFETY for later. how bout you declare friends with the nice guy and keep him around till you have enough of the bad guy and THEN, when you´ve had enough of fooling around, go for the nice guy, have children and build a stable family.

i never said bad boys stick around or would make a good father, however, DANGER = EXCITEMENT = FUN :)

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Originally posted by sassa

i am afraid i cannot notarize that, can only tell you i try to be good with people, but anyways,

you have a point.

I'm sorry if it came off as harsh, but I've heard it too many times before. Now get out there and burn yourself. :aright:

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Originally posted by tastey

there you go, there you go. good analyzation.

and sassa, i guess you´re still young, so i´d go for the FUN and safe the SAFETY for later. how bout you declare friends with the nice guy and keep him around till you have enough of the bad guy and THEN, when you´ve had enough of fooling around, go for the nice guy, have children and build a stable family.

i never said bad boys stick around or would make a good father, however, DANGER = EXCITEMENT = FUN :)

Ok, and I'm gonna add this. If you're gonna keep the nice guy around, at least throw him a fucking bone from time to time so he doesn't get torn to pieces over your irresponsible, yet fun, behavior. 'Cause you know full fucking well that you're gonna get him on the fucking phone at 10 at night when the asshole fucks up.:aright:

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seems like your not so "out of sight out of mind" oriented as you thought if your still thinking about number 1 three months after he left. sounds like theres a spark there, on the other hand number 2 is a husband type. you have to ask yourself whether your looking for sex, or a serious long term relationship. you may not really be looking for the husband type right now. in the end all that really matters is your happiness, so whichever course of action makes you happiest is the best. just do you

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