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harddtime

To appologize or not to....

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Just wanted to get some feedback on whether i should appoligize or it's too late and i should just leave this in the past. I was talking to one of my friends from HS and reminising(sp?) on the the shit we used to do and he reminded me of how much of assholes we used to be to this one girl that i used to be with for a little. Its all in the past (over 3 years ago) but i kinda grew up and feel bad about the immature shit we did. I'm not really like that nor do i recall being like that to anyone else, but for some reason just being a stupid kid i was def pretty mean to this girl. Do you guys think I should i email her and appoligize or just forget it about it. Let me know.

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I'm a big fan of apologies... some people just let things slide, but to others, an apology, no matter how late, means a lot.

You don't stand to lose anything by making the effort, in any case.

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I would, because you never know if you and your friend might get that call from the Ricki Lake show, calling you out, to witness the amazing transzformation of this girl, and she'll rub it all in your face, and you guys will be like :what: :what:

;)

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Originally posted by gmccookny

I would, because you never know if you and your friend might get that call from the Ricki Lake show, calling you out, to witness the amazing transzformation of this girl, and she'll rub it all in your face, and you guys will be like :what: :what:

;)

lol... and never forget Steve Buscemi in Billy Madison!!!

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Originally posted by gmccookny

I would, because you never know if you and your friend might get that call from the Ricki Lake show, calling you out, to witness the amazing transzformation of this girl, and she'll rub it all in your face, and you guys will be like :what: :what:

;)

lol, i'd never go on one of those shows, in any case she was always banging, even back then.

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. . . I'd apologize . . . A person that used to be a constant shit starter with me came around a coupla years back and apologized . . . I hadn't thought about the abuse and ridicule in years, but something deep inside reached closure with that gesture . . .

. . .Oh and I disagree, she has NOT forgotten about it, ESPECIALLY if you were an incredible prick to her . . . Anybody who received severe abuse from their peers while growing up has damage from it . . .

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Originally posted by phuturephunk

.

. . .Oh and I disagree, she has NOT forgotten about it, ESPECIALLY if you were an incredible prick to her . . . Anybody who received severe abuse from their peers while growing up has damage from it . . .

fuck that. people used to be pricks to me, i dont remember & i dont want to.

fuck your cleansing & trying to make yourself feel better for being an asshole back then. dont use her as a tool to make yourself feel better now.

if someone from the past who was an asshole to me contacted me i would be like 'yeah thats great, why are you calling me'.

instead of feeling bad for the things you did in the past make a conscious effort to change who you are. put positive energy into your words and actions, impact someone in a good way.

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Originally posted by somebitch

fuck that. people used to be pricks to me, i dont remember & i dont want to.

fuck your cleansing & trying to make yourself feel better for being an asshole back then. dont use her as a tool to make yourself feel better now.

if someone from the past who was an asshole to me contacted me i would be like 'yeah thats great, why are you calling me'.

instead of feeling bad for the things you did in the past make a conscious effort to change who you are. put positive energy into your words and actions, impact someone in a good way.

. . . I can see your point . . .

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Originally posted by somebitch

fuck that. people used to be pricks to me, i dont remember & i dont want to.

fuck your cleansing & trying to make yourself feel better for being an asshole back then. dont use her as a tool to make yourself feel better now.

if someone from the past who was an asshole to me contacted me i would be like 'yeah thats great, why are you calling me'.

instead of feeling bad for the things you did in the past make a conscious effort to change who you are. put positive energy into your words and actions, impact someone in a good way.

i see your point too but the thing is that i'm def diff from the way i acted towards her, it's the one time i look back on and feel ashamed of the shit i did. I dunno....your the only person who says not to....still thinking about it...

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Originally posted by harddtime

i see your point too but the thing is that i'm def diff from the way i acted towards her, it's the one time i look back on and feel ashamed of the shit i did. I dunno....your the only person who says not to....still thinking about it...

i guess if it's on your mind, it's on your mind for a reason, whether you take it asa need to communicate with this girl or as a reminder of the personal advances you have made is your choice.

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Sometimes when people are picked on a lot as kids, they grow up thinking there's something wrong with them... Even if they can intellectually argue that there isn't, there may still be an emotional uncertainty that lingers with them. Perhaps if one of those bullies came back in later years to explain that they were wrong, it might, so some small extent, help to put the person's mind at ease.

That's how I'd think about it, anyway...

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If you come in contact with these people then I guess I would apologize cause they are still somewhat in your life. If you havent seen these people for the longest time then don't go out of your way tracking them down to apologize...:D

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Originally posted by hoke

Sometimes when people are picked on a lot as kids, they grow up thinking there's something wrong with them... Even if they can intellectually argue that there isn't, there may still be an emotional uncertainty that lingers with them. Perhaps if one of those bullies came back in later years to explain that they were wrong, it might, so some small extent, help to put the person's mind at ease.

That's how I'd think about it, anyway...

. . . I actually agree with you . ..

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it's never too late to make amends.

step 8 of every twelve step program is:

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

this is one of the last few steps because it is one of the harder and more adult steps to go through. it requires soul-searching, self-forgiveness, empathy, courage, effort, and caring - all great things. i say, go for it :) .

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Originally posted by phuturephunk

. . . I'd apologize . . . A person that used to be a constant shit starter with me came around a coupla years back and apologized . . . I hadn't thought about the abuse and ridicule in years, but something deep inside reached closure with that gesture . . .

. . .Oh and I disagree, she has NOT forgotten about it, ESPECIALLY if you were an incredible prick to her . . . Anybody who received severe abuse from their peers while growing up has damage from it . . .

I completely agree......DEFINITELY appologize...I'm sure that it will make her feel good....I know it would make me feel better and give me some kind of closure if someone appologized for treating me badly....Let us know what happens!!:D

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Apologize....She probably doesn't think much of what happened anymore since it was a long time ago & HS etc. but if you say your sorry even after all this time....it will probably make her feel better...and she won't think you are scum anymore :D

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