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Worst Sexual Encounters: Funny and Scary Stories


trancerxn112

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I guess ill start it off... i dont know weither this is funny or scary but... I was going out with this freshman when i was a junior (HS) and she was cute but really really prude... anyway after about a few weeks of not getting past sloppy second ( :) ) we finally started to move into un chartered territory (for her at least) anyway she decided she wanted to give me head... music to my ears right... wrong! she starts to kiss down my stomach, gently grabs my dick, put her mouth around it and proceeds to BLOW on my dick... now since she had her mouth securely fastened around my man hood there was no where for the air to go... the pain was beyond anything i could comprehend and at that moment i thought i was going to die... :) end of story but from that day on i always make sure a girl knows that a blow job... doesnt imply BLOWING ON MY DICK!

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okay... i'll bite....

I was dating this guy in high school... a lil prude.. ok REALLY prude... we were together for a couple months and had done nothing but kissing... i figured id break him in cuz i sensed that he needed some coaching lol.... soooo.... i went with him to his senior prom... afterwards we all went back to sleep at his friend diana's house. so we're in the basement, sleeping in blankets on the floor. of course i initiate everything... we were kissing and i decided to go downtown and see how he responded. so i started making my way down...before i could make it down there he says "please dont" now im like ok what kind of guy would say NO! so i was like just relax... i was being selfish.. thinking well maybe if i break him in and make him feel comfortable, he'll at least TOUCH me... so i did and he enjoyed it ;) so i was like good this is a good thing! so after he finished, i made my way back up and started kissing him and trying to get him to touch me a lil.. instead... he goes "wow im reeeeeallly tired." turns over... and passes out.

:cuss: <~me

i let this one slide... another time we were at his house... and we were makin out in his room.. and he was all about it.. so i did it again for him... figuring ok maybe this time he feels more comfortable.. thinking that iiiii might get some action outta this!!! so i did... and he refused to touch me down there. i was like wtf?!?!

that was that.

and needless to say, the relationship didnt last very long.

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Originally posted by ou812

Great fuckin story. What did she do, inflate your bladder like a balloon?

whatever she did it hurt like hell... let this be a lesson to everyone... always make sure the girl you are with doesnt repeat this terrible mistake!

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Originally posted by linabina

okay... i'll bite....

I was dating this guy in high school... a lil prude.. ok REALLY prude... we were together for a couple months and had done nothing but kissing... i figured id break him in cuz i sensed that he needed some coaching lol.... soooo.... i went with him to his senior prom... afterwards we all went back to sleep at his friend diana's house. so we're in the basement, sleeping in blankets on the floor. of course i initiate everything... we were kissing and i decided to go downtown and see how he responded. so i started making my way down...before i could make it down there he says "please dont" now im like ok what kind of guy would say NO! so i was like just relax... i was being selfish.. thinking well maybe if i break him in and make him feel comfortable, he'll at least TOUCH me... so i did and he enjoyed it ;) so i was like good this is a good thing! so after he finished, i made my way back up and started kissing him and trying to get him to touch me a lil.. instead... he goes "wow im reeeeeallly tired." turns over... and passes out.

:cuss: <~me

i let this one slide... another time we were at his house... and we were makin out in his room.. and he was all about it.. so i did it again for him... figuring ok maybe this time he feels more comfortable.. thinking that iiiii might get some action outta this!!! so i did... and he refused to touch me down there. i was like wtf?!?!

that was that.

and needless to say, the relationship didnt last very long.

lol Lynne the closet deviant!

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Originally posted by linabina

okay... i'll bite....

I was dating this guy in high school... a lil prude.. ok REALLY prude... we were together for a couple months and had done nothing but kissing... i figured id break him in cuz i sensed that he needed some coaching lol.... soooo.... i went with him to his senior prom... afterwards we all went back to sleep at his friend diana's house. so we're in the basement, sleeping in blankets on the floor. of course i initiate everything... we were kissing and i decided to go downtown and see how he responded. so i started making my way down...before i could make it down there he says "please dont" now im like ok what kind of guy would say NO! so i was like just relax... i was being selfish.. thinking well maybe if i break him in and make him feel comfortable, he'll at least TOUCH me... so i did and he enjoyed it ;) so i was like good this is a good thing! so after he finished, i made my way back up and started kissing him and trying to get him to touch me a lil.. instead... he goes "wow im reeeeeallly tired." turns over... and passes out.

:cuss: <~me

i let this one slide... another time we were at his house... and we were makin out in his room.. and he was all about it.. so i did it again for him... figuring ok maybe this time he feels more comfortable.. thinking that iiiii might get some action outta this!!! so i did... and he refused to touch me down there. i was like wtf?!?!

that was that.

and needless to say, the relationship didnt last very long.

Maybe he was gay, and was imagining you were a guy while you were down on him.

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Originally posted by trancerxn112

44 views... and only 2 stories... doesnt ANYONE have nightmarish or hilarious sexual encounters?!!!?!

Well, see, there was this one time, at Band Camp...................ahhhhh, nevermind.

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Ok, here's one It was not me but one of my house mates when I rented a house for a yr at school.

It was right before finals and my housemate hadn't gotten with girl at all that yr (by this I mean slept with and he was a virgin) So he was like I need to get laid bfore the end of school. So we threw a party and during the course of it he got together with a friend of mine. I walk in on them in basement and they were on an area rug. he was pushing her around it so I left. The funny part was he came up to me and was like she gave me an STD. I said no way then he whips it out and says it's the clap and that my friend is a ho. The thing is he never got it in and got a friction burn and, well, she was to wasted to say anything.. the rug was burn that day

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Originally posted by fearlesss

Ok, here's one It was not me but one of my house mates when I rented a house for a yr at school.

It was right before finals and my housemate hadn't gotten with girl at all that yr (by this I mean slept with and he was a virgin) So he was like I need to get laid bfore the end of school. So we threw a party and during the course of it he got together with a friend of mine. I walk in on them in basement and they were on an area rug. he was pushing her around it so I left. The funny part was he came up to me and was like she gave me an STD. I said no way then he whips it and says it's the clap and that my friends is a ho. The thing is he never got it in and got a friction burn and well she was to wasted to say anything

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

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Originally posted by fearlesss

Ok, here's one It was not me but one of my house mates when I rented a house for a yr at school.

It was right before finals and my housemate hadn't gotten with girl at all that yr (by this I mean slept with and he was a virgin) So he was like I need to get laid bfore the end of school. So we threw a party and during the course of it he got together with a friend of mine. I walk in on them in basement and they were on an area rug. he was pushing her around it so I left. The funny part was he came up to me and was like she gave me an STD. I said no way then he whips it out and says it's the clap and that my friend is a ho. The thing is he never got it in and got a friction burn and, well, she was to wasted to say anything.. the rug was burn that day

lol the clap!!! nice one...

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Ya'll don't know me but I will bite.

I was at a lock in at a church...one of those things where you stay all night and play volleyabll, dodge ball, manhunt, ect....

Anyway he night goes on and I start to make out with this girl, nice girl....and I am a nice guy. Making out goes to feeling her up, her feeling me up and down, next thing you know I am fingering a girl in a church....yeah.

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Originally posted by pennywise

Ya'll don't know me but I will bite.

I was at a lock in at a church...one of those things where you stay all night and play volleyabll, dodge ball, manhunt, ect....

Anyway he night goes on and I start to make out with this girl, nice girl....and I am a nice guy. Making out goes to feeling her up, her feeling me up and down, next thing you know I am fingering a girl in a church....yeah.

you are going to hell!

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