deanna11 Posted December 28 Report Share Posted December 28 Originally posted by dolcemimi: Black,Asian gay are not same thing as handicaps. Handicap is a medical term. Then might as well as put in white and hispanic and Jews in there too. All the girls are calling me a narrow minded- shallow whatever .. All the guys are saying - that the guys is some sord of handicap playboy who uses sympathy to get laid.. ... 2 totally different point of views ...how interesting .. "handicap" is not a medical term; it's a description. a "medical term" addresses a condition that requires practice of medicine, if it's about a person's particularityand yes, put white, hispanic, or Jew in there too. put whatever you want. any way, what you wrote still sounds prejudiced to me I'M the one calling you shallow and narrow-minded. and if you interpret what all males responded as you did, then you have other issues besideshere's a medical term for you: fucking idiot------------------FOR SALE: ROOMMATE. CHEAP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kramadas Posted December 28 Report Share Posted December 28 I guess the bottom line is : Don't date him out of pity. And if his handicap grosses you out, then admit it - thats you, and no-one can judge YOU as a person for it (they can judge your actions but not YOU as a person). But, please, do not come on here and give us two different stories, and then start "whining" about whether you like him or not, if you're grossed out or not. PeacePS: A word of advice. Your pre-judices are your own, but its usually better for you if you don't put people in categories when its unecessary. IE, the fact that he's a handicap doesn't make a difference when it comes to personality - if he uses that handicap as a pity tool, then his personality was probably off in the first place.------------------"I would believe only in a god who could dance."Nietzche Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smileygirl Posted December 28 Report Share Posted December 28 I have to post my opinion about this...My best friend has a handicap--she does not have a left hand and let me tell you, this girl have more friends that any other perosn i know. In almost every town it seems like she runs into someone she knows--and she is a very beautiful girl too with an amazing personaality who can get any man she wants and infact--not one of the guys she has dated has EVERt turned her down because of thsi handicap--which isn't even a handicap if you think about it. So, referring to your question, dating someone who has a handicap, or going on a date with this person i guess depends on what kind of person you are? That is your own question to answer sweetie. Was this man nice? He seemed kind and truthful by telling you about hi accident and then by giving you a kiss on the check... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clubkate Posted December 28 Report Share Posted December 28 I cant believe how trifling some of you sound. Why would you even consider dating someone if something permanent about them 'grossed' you out? i enjoyed how the story snowballed as well.--------------------------------------------fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brianz54 Posted December 28 Report Share Posted December 28 Originally posted by dolcemimi: Would you date someone who was handicpped ? I was at Lotus one night. And I was talking to this guy the whole night and at the middle of the conversation, he tells he lost his right hand in a motorcycle accident. He tells me he thinks I'm nice because I talked to him and he gives me his number.Then he kissed me on the cheek .. Would you date someone out of pity ? [This message has been edited by dolcemimi (edited 12-28-2000).]Pity??? People who are handicapped do not need your pity as they are probably more able-bodied then you will ever be! I broke two bones in my left leg two years ago and was in a full leg cast for three months. During that time I gained a newfound respect for the handicapped seeing the crap that they have to put up with on a daily basis! I eventually healed and they never will and they deal with it successfully! ------------------ Just in case... brianz54@hotmail.com [This message has been edited by brianz54 (edited 12-28-2000).] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathyo Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 My son has severe left side weakness on his left side due to hydrocephalus (water on the brain). You can't tell he has a disability (not a handicap!) until you watch him for a while. He has all of his limbs but not full use of the left. Things like tying his shoes and zipping his jacket are very difficult. It's not that bad...just enough to be different. He has been teased, outcast and left out. He has a severe self esteem problem...oh and by the way, he is the most giving sensitive and kind 12 year old I've ever known and I'm not saying that because I am his mother. All who have met him agree.My only hope is that he doesn't run into a girl like this. Don't be shallow, it might come back to you someday.BTW, maybe he harped on it because he wanted to be sure it wasn't a problem. I'm sure if you were in his shoes you would obsess about it too.Sorry, but I've had the displeasure of dealing with peoples reactions first hand and it makes me insane with anger. There is nothing like seeing your child surrounded by other kids teasing him. It drives me mad. I could go on all night, I just wish you could meet him and you would know how wrong it is to judge by appearance. ------------------ A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to it's old dimensions.~*~*~Don't use time or words carelessly, neither can be retrieved.~*~*~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eviljav666 Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 i think if you like him...give it a try....you never know he can be perfect....i have a thing with time...you could walk out the door at 9:49 and your soul mate walks in 10:01...point is you didnt met him and that was it..him you met and had a real conversation...and he had a profound effect on you...SO follow your instincts..and your heart...you'll be happy you did....kill KILL YOUR PARENTS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blueangel Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by dolcemimi: I might sound flakey- but if you were in the same shoes you'd have mixed feelings too. We've been thought that predujice based on skin color is wrong but predujice based on physical handicap ( obesity, missing limbs, vertically challenged and etc.) aren't really dealt with. Sometimes you just don't know how to deal with people . [This message has been edited by dolcemimi (edited 12-28-2000).]It's very simple why I call you flakey and fake. You claim to be such a passionate person but at a drop of a hat you also claim that his missing hand disgusts you. So which is it? Don't pretend like you're there cause you feel pity for him and then claim that he harrassed you!! Do you see the logic in your statements?? It doesn't make sense!! That's why I called you a fake . . . and a flake . . . and now you're just a plain BlueAngel------------------“Life is the childhood of our immortality." -Goethe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxyroxy20 Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 If u r not attracted to that guy, dont date him cause u feel sorry for him. You're only hurting him and urself.But what i dont understand is u say if any of us would date out of pitty?? but u must of thought he was attracted b4 to talk to him in the first place, and would you date him if he wasnt handicapped?? I dont think ur narrow minded or shallow just cause u dont want to date a handicap, to each their own, everybody has their preference. Everybody has their own choice who to date/not date.------------------aim: amafrk1amafrk1@yahoo.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cotoncandydream Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Anyone Else think this chicks story is a little off??? I am agreeing with Deana11 on this!! ------------------Failure is not an Option!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ooana Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 This amazes me. First of all, how do you know that someone behind these black letters on a white screen might themselves be handicapped?Also, the fact that you've never "dealt" with a handicapped person is rather shocking. I assure you, even if you did not know it at the time, you have.Be very very grateful your body hasn't been injured or betrayed you in any way. People with handicaps don't need your pity, they need your compassion and the very HUMAN ability to look them in the eye and not see a man or woman without a hand, foot, lip, ear what have you.I have dated a man with a handicap, and I was and am blessed to know him. If you can't see beyond this man at Lotus's handicap, he's damn lucky that you're not at all interested in him. In fact, thank GOD you're not.-Oo------------------"When the soul wishes to experience something, she throws an image of the experience out before her, and enters into her own image."---"You have wings! Why don't I have wings?!"---"Cause you're a boy, silly.""For the Greeks, the hidden life demanded invisible ink. They wrote an ordinary letter and in between the lines set out to write another letter, written in milk. The document looked innocent enough until one who knew better sprinkled coal-dust over it. What the letter had been no longer mattered: what mattered was the life flaring up undetected..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlea Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Personally, I wouldn't want anyone dating me for pity, don't need those kind of favors.As for the girl who posted this, I think you answered your own question. Now can we move on........gracias------------------People come into your life for reasons not yet known, keep your mind, heart and soul open.AIM: Xxlea77 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bungee Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 OK, one final note, I would date him if I got to use his handicapped parking space at PATHMARK. ------------------Sticks and Stones may break my bones..but..words..can't..hurt..meeeee...so there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xxlea Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by bungee:OK, one final note, I would date him if I got to use his handicapped parking space at PATHMARK. LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!! Good one! Trust me they come in handy!!!!------------------People come into your life for reasons not yet known, keep your mind, heart and soul open.AIM: Xxlea77 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 I see it this way, God blessed some people to see past a persons looks, past a persons faults be it physical or mental.. Weak people pitty, strong people Love... God blessed us with certain physical and mental traits to set us apart from eachother, this is what makes a person special, you should not feel sorry for this person, this person should also not feel sorry for them selves.. oh well just my $0.02... maybe i'm wrong.. try to empathise.. if you were missing an arm or a leg, or maybe your blind or deff.. would you want a person to feel sorry for you, and date you because of that? i think not.. Another good reason not to pitty someone is because there pittying them self.. ------------------~LiPz~ aim:LikmyLipzicq:101504929"A good man is hard to find, A hard man is Good to find"/>http://hometown.aol.com/lipzlipzlipz/LIPZ.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
divalicious Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 I guess the answer to the original question would be yes. Seems I've dated plenty of men who were mentally handicapped...------------------ Peace Love Happiness y'all DivaliciousNYC@aol.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmitry Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 First of just because he is missing a hand doesn't make him handicapped. I'm missing a left hand I would get offended if someone thought of me as being handicapped. I hate any sympathy, or attention. I always hide my arm because if I dont people feel sorry for me open doors, stair, and I hate that more then anything and I'm sure this guy would hate to get a date because someone is feeling sorry for him. I wont lie it sucks balls wish I had two but some people out there have a real handicapped and I feel fortunate that I'm only missing that. Dmitry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmitry Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 "But his handicap also grosses me out ! Dolcemini he might have something that he cant change and it grosses you out but you have something that you CAN change(your attitude) and it grosses me out, and I'm sure if he read this it would gross him out as well.Dmitry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmyloco Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Shallow question posed by a shallow person .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mp3some Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by cotoncandydream:Anyone Else think this chicks story is a little off??? I am agreeing with Deana11 on this!! Same here! WTF?! can u spell D R A M A?!!? Move on sis... It's not like he raped u so... Chill out.------------------Peace, Love & Twilo for Everyone!!! "That's the last time I ever do crystal meth, speed, heroin, pot, 12 cookies' worth of acid, ether, ecstacy, and cocaine in a four- hour period.Or was that just Tranceport?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahkim13 Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 I have to agree with Dmitry- missing a hand doen't make someone handicapped. At least in my definition, you are hadicapped if a disability holds you back. My brother, who is a quadraplegic, will be in a wheelchair for the rest of his life- he has many obstacles to tackle which to you and me are trivial. My other brother, who has a motor control problem, is a bit akward in his movement. Now nither of them, at least in my mind, are handicapped. They both overcome their handicaps on a daily basis. You, on the other 'hand', have some issues to deal with. Where were you educated? Aside from my brothers, I have met countless people with different physical problems. You remind me of a former roommate of mine. She had never met a Jewish person- She actually said to me, "What do you mean? You don't celebrate Christmas?" I educated her and now she knows about other religions.You sound very young and very ignorant. And I don't mean ignorant in a demeaning way. You just need to open your eyes and see that the world is a different place from the suburban whitebred life from which you grew up. People don't live happily ever after. Life can be full of obstacles.If anything (that is, if he was a lech), you got played by a 'person'- not by a handicapped person. I don't think that this guy considers his life to revolve around his missing hand- Although you seen to think that is the case.If you like this guy, date him. If you don't like this guy, don't date him. But what does his missing hand have to do with anything?If you were approached by one of my brothers, and responded to either of them in this way, I'd bitch slap you!Hopefully this would knock some sense into you.Peace and love,SK13------------------I've got plans, lots of 'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahkim13 Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 I have to agree with Dmitry- missing a hand doen't make someone handicapped. At least in my definition, you are hadicapped if a disability holds you back. My brother, who is a quadraplegic, will be in a wheelchair for the rest of his life- he has many obstacles to tackle which to you and me are trivial. My other brother, who has a motor control problem, is a bit akward in his movement. Now nither of them, at least in my mind, are handicapped. They both overcome their handicaps on a daily basis. You, on the other 'hand', have some issues to deal with. Where were you educated? Aside from my brothers, I have met countless people with different physical problems. You remind me of a former roommate of mine. She had never met a Jewish person- She actually said to me, "What do you mean? You don't celebrate Christmas?" I educated her and now she knows about other religions.You sound very young and very ignorant. And I don't mean ignorant in a demeaning way. You just need to open your eyes and see that the world is a different place from the suburban whitebred life from which you grew up. People don't live happily ever after. Life can be full of obstacles.If anything (that is, if he was a lech), you got played by a 'person'- not by a handicapped person. I don't think that this guy considers his life to revolve around his missing hand- Although you seen to think that is the case.If you like this guy, date him. If you don't like this guy, don't date him. But what does his missing hand have to do with anything?If you were approached by one of my brothers, and responded to either of them in this way, I'd bitch slap you!Hopefully this would knock some sense into you.Peace and love,SK13------------------I've got plans, lots of 'em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j303j Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 WHO WAS AN ASSHOLE LIKE YOU????? NEVER ------------------ E C S T A S Y why cause i wanna get high!!!!!AOL J303J Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tjspooky Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 This is a damn heated topic. I would have to say the original asker of the question seems quite stuck up and naive, but would venture to say that most of us are in the same boat.I was at a bar the other night (the Dresden out here in Hollywood) and my friend was talking to this sweetheart of a girl all night. I and a buddy of mine could tell that she wasn't sitting in a normal chair but a wheelchair. Well, my friend flirting with her didn't know this until later in the night when he got up to leave.And then he has the audacity to ask me why I didn't come up and "save" him from the situation. I blew up right there! I don't know if I could date someone in a wheelchair or what prejudices I hold against such, but this girl was sweet and cute and don't think it fair to treat anyone like an outcast.~~peace and love in all the right places~~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ezdreamer Posted December 29 Report Share Posted December 29 Originally posted by dolcemimi: HOW DO YOU KNOW I'm SHALLOW ?Prove it. If you blow me, I will never think you're shallow.Don't be so harsh on handicapped peeps... here, I'll stick my handicapped pinky up your ass and make you feel good all over... I like to call my pinky THE PILEDRIVER.------------------Skip the little dream, go for the BIG one... or cya in the next life... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.