dolcemimi Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 I have a friend and sometimes he comes off as being gay. He talks gay. He has impeccable taste in fashion, music, art and HOME DECOR ! He works in an industry where there's plenty of gay men. His boss is a gay man. He lives in Chelsea (gay neighborhood) He lives gay in a very gay environment. If a straight guy is surrounded by all this gayness - is it hard for themto stay straight ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momadance Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 mabey he just doesnt know it yet------------------"Puff, Puff, Pass" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahb53 Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Sounds like a couple of my best friends. The one has come out to me, but is not ready to publicly for whatever reason. I bet your friend is gay.------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ichi_gami Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 There are plenty of effeminate men who are 100% straight. Being gay is not about the things you have listed, but whom you decide to share your life with, someone of the same gender as you. There are tons of gay men who "act straight," is this a "problem" as it seems a straight man who "acts gay" is?I think you need to step back and check your stereotypes to see if there is any validity to them...ichi ------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gravity Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by dolcemimi: I have a friend and sometimes he comes off as being gay. He talks gay. He has impeccable taste in fashion, music, art and HOME DECOR ! He works in an industry where there's plenty of gay men. His boss is a gay man. He lives in Chelsea (gay neighborhood) He lives gay in a very gay environment. If a straight guy is surrounded by all this gayness - is it hard for themto stay straight ? My girlfriend lives in Chelsea...do you think there's a possibility that she may wake up one day and be a gay man?If your friend "talks gay" hangs out with mostly gay people, "lives gay" (whatever the fuck that means)...then he probably IS gay, however, it has nothing to do with his enviornment. From the lifestyle he leads, he doesnt seem to be hiding it. If he's not gay, then many of his manurisms and interest might be a reflection of those he is with, but I doubt that means he is going to wake up one day and start taking it up the ass.Your question is in line with all the other stupid shit you post here day in and day out...proving either you write for the sake of having nothing else to do or that you truly are a fucking idiot. ------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." I go places, I interact...(What places?)Certain, clubs. Like, Paradise. It's not bad.It's just that feeling when you can take your shirt off and really dance. When the music owns you. Do you understand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anthonyp Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Hhmm, let me see, I go to school for Interior Design, I love fashion and home decor, I go to gay clubs and have a few gay friends, but yet I have a girlfriend whom I truly love and I'm 110% straight.Not only gay men are into these things.------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dolcemimi Posted March 6 Author Report Share Posted March 6 I post becuz I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO . Back to my friend. - He's NOT effeminate nor sensitive. He's always surrounded by beautiful women. Who knows... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petp Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by dolcemimi: He has impeccable taste in fashion, music, art and HOME DECOR ! just because someone has good taste or a sense of style, doesnt mean theyre gay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gravity Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by dolcemimi: I post becuz I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO . Back to my friend. - He's NOT effeminate nor sensitive. He's always surrounded by beautiful women. Who knows...I thought he was "surrounded by all this gayness" Anyway, since when does sensitivity, and even being somewhat feminine= being gay?------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." I go places, I interact...(What places?)Certain, clubs. Like, Paradise. It's not bad.It's just that feeling when you can take your shirt off and really dance. When the music owns you. Do you understand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boa_boy Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by ichi_gami:There are plenty of effeminate men who are 100% straight. Being gay is not about the things you have listed, but whom you decide to share your life with, someone of the same gender as you. There are tons of gay men who "act straight," is this a "problem" as it seems a straight man who "acts gay" is?I think you need to step back and check your stereotypes to see if there is any validity to them...ichi beat me 2 it ichi...I'm straighty 180 but when I'm in a gay environment (Sydney 2nd biggest gay city in the world lol) I've been known to camp it up...but it doesn't mean I'm gay!(not that there's anything wrong with that to quote Seinfeld) ------------------"At the peak of tremendous and victorious effort, while the blood is pounding in your head, all suddenly comes quiet within you. Everything seems clearer and whiter than ever before, as if great spotlights had been turned on. At that moment, you have the conviction that you contain all the power in the world, that you are capable of everything, that you have wings. There is no more precise moment in life than this, the WHITE MOMENT, and you will work hard for years, just to taste it again.''Yuri Vlason. -----------PM sux email is better-------> boa_boy@yahoo.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dolcemimi Posted March 6 Author Report Share Posted March 6 The dude gets tons of girls. Because he's good looking, has $$$ . Yet- there's something really gay about him. Maybe he's hiding behind his army of beautiful women. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resident Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 OK, now that everyone's done jumping up and down and being politically correct and sensitive about things (and I mean you, gravity), let's notice that no one answered the original question. Originally posted by dolcemimi:If a straight guy is surrounded by all this gayness - is it hard for themto stay straight ?The answer is No, because I am straight no matter what I am surrounded with, but would I voluntarily put myself into an environment like that for prolonged periods of time? No.Is your friend gay? Hell would I know. He's your friend, why are you asking us to figure that out?Alex "equalopportunityoffender"------------------tweaky is the answer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gravity Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by resident:OK, now that everyone's done jumping up and down and being politically correct and sensitive about things (and I mean you, gravity), Huh?------------------"The world is a better place because of those who refuse to believe they can't fly." I go places, I interact...(What places?)Certain, clubs. Like, Paradise. It's not bad.It's just that feeling when you can take your shirt off and really dance. When the music owns you. Do you understand? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ichi_gami Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by resident:OK, now that everyone's done jumping up and down and being politically correct and sensitive about things (and I mean you, gravity), let's notice that no one answered the original question. The answer is No, because I am straight no matter what I am surrounded with, but would I voluntarily put myself into an environment like that for prolonged periods of time? No.Is your friend gay? Hell would I know. He's your friend, why are you asking us to figure that out?Alex "equalopportunityoffender"Alex - I think the question DID get answered. THE FACTORS LISTED DO NOT MAKE A MAN GAY OR STRAIGHT. Or, to spoon feed, A MAN DOES NOT BECOME GAY BY BEING AROUND SWATCHES OF FABRIC AND MADONNA RECORDS. Dumb it down further? UNLESS HE WANTS SEX WITH OTHER MEN, AND AND NEEDS A MAN IN HIS LIFE TO SHARE WITH, HE IS NOT GAY NOR IS HE BECOMING GAY.Damn, are people just thick this morning because of the weather?ichi------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resident Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by ichi_gami:Alex - I think the question DID get answered. THE FACTORS LISTED DO NOT MAKE A MAN GAY OR STRAIGHT. Or, to spoon feed, A MAN DOES NOT BECOME GAY BY BEING AROUND SWATCHES OF FABRIC AND MADONNA RECORDS. Dumb it down further? UNLESS HE WANTS SEX WITH OTHER MEN, AND AND NEEDS A MAN IN HIS LIFE TO SHARE WITH, HE IS NOT GAY NOR IS HE BECOMING GAY.I didn't say that one becomes gay by virtue of threads, music, or neighborhoods. Obviously you assumed that I did, because you were compelled to write the above. Dolce asked, "Is it hard for a straight man to stay straight, blah blah blah". That doesn't necessitate a discussion of what does or does not make a man gay; in my opinion, it calls for a statement that "staying straight" isn't an effort that one has to make. ------------------tweaky is the answer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoom Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 I'd have to meet the guy , but it's likely that he is gay and he is in denial or hasn't come out yet. I sometimes fall into the category you mentioned, but i'm definitely straight. The talk is the dead giveaway, especially the neighborhood. Hello? That lisp isn't a born thing. I would never live near a gay neighborhood and never work in a gay industry, I get bothered enough in clubs and the gym as is... Taste is one thing, but the few guys who are straight, have good taste and are considered possibly gay know better than to do things like that guy is doing... you'll see... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JackMeOff Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by dolcemimi: I post becuz I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO . Back to my friend. - He's NOT effeminate nor sensitive. He's always surrounded by beautiful women. Who knows...Maybe that's his way of getting those beautiful women.------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jammy Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 I think your friend is pretty confident in himself and his sexuality and if he is or isn't gay, what does that matter? He is apparently happy in the state he is in...He has girls, money, and a nice place (taking a guess). Why should he have to defend himself to you if he is gay or not based on him "acting gay"? And as far as that, what the hell is acting gay? Dressing a certain way, going to see shows often? I have a friend that dresses well, likes to go to nice restaurants, and is my Broadway show buddy. A lot of my other friends thinks he is gay, but all in all who cares. I sure don't nor do I think about it. -Jamms ------------------Haben Sie Ihr Schuhe auf tanzt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
translucent Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 While being surrounded by a certain type of people in a certain environment might affect one's tastes, views and mannerisms, I don't think anyone has proven yet that it could affect someone's sexual preference. In fact, there are plenty of studies supporting that sexual preference is genetic. Some truly bisexual people might be swayed to experimentation when the social stigma of homosexuality is no longer around them. Others, might turn to homosexuality later in life as a result of childhood sexual trauma. Nevertheless, if a man enjoys the sort of lifestyle as your "friend" does, it doesn't necessarily mean that he's going gay or even "acting" gay. It probably means that he's more secure about his masculinity than most men who attend football games and monster truck rallies. Being a secure man, he doesn't need to put any effort into staying heterosexual by acting straight for anyone's approval.------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Originally posted by translucent:It probably means that he's more secure about his masculinity than most men who attend football games and monster truck rallies. Being a secure man, he doesn't need to put any effort into staying heterosexual by acting straight for anyone's approval.BRAVO!!! Very well-put. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unbound Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 I'M WITH translucent ON THIS ONE - VERY WELL PUT -Also don’t forget the term itself "acting gay" would only be but forth by a straight individual – it would never even occur to a gay man! As you say he would never be “hiding behind his army of beautiful women.” – he would not need to…he's gay!Did you ever defend your sexuality by hiding behind men? (I assume you’re heterosexual) - no – I don’t think anybody would do thatOn the contrary, from a personal point of view – I am very conscious of my masculinity (perhapsCauseI’mInsecure–godKnows?), – whenever I dance - I feel like I look gay – but the only reason I am conscious of it is because I am straight – if I was gay I would not feel conscious of myself and would not be insecure because I would simply be acting myself.likewise he would not need to hide behind anythingWell that’s my 2 heterosexual cents!------------------ UNBOUNDGettin'UNWOUND AIM: ZUinc2000 TëMA[This message has been edited by Unbound (edited 03-06-2001).] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a691vcc Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 just show the dude a penthouse and observe his reaction. if hiz reaction to it seemz kinda funny, than the dude iz hiding hiz gayness so people don't disciminate against him. That magazine Roolz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
n30 Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 ok umn i went to highschool there 3 yrs ago... i didnt become gay there were like construction ppl were like hitting on me and shiat... so not kewl... ------------------whats your major malfunction numb nuts!![This message has been edited by n30 (edited 03-06-2001).] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmgreenz Posted March 7 Report Share Posted March 7 isn't there an expression, when in Rome. . . .?Maybe your friend is just being absorbed into some parts of the environment that he's part of. But, I have one friend in particular that sounds a lot like your friend. We all think he's gay. Gay guys think he gay, and some of the women he's dated think he's gay too. It seems like he's the last to know. ;-)I once described my new lifestyle in NYC to a friend of mine from DC (who is gay) and when I was done, he asked me 'if I still liked girls'. It was pretty funny because I was rambling on about my cute apartment in the west village, my green suede sofa, new fashionable threads, seeing Junior Vasquez spin at Twilo, my Miata. . . If I didn't know me, I'd ask too.He had me worried for a minute. But, after a double take, I realized I'm the same guy I've always been, I just live in NYC now.------------------DM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dabiatchka Posted March 7 Report Share Posted March 7 Holy shit yeah I've been contemplating the same thing. A friend of mine, who is very good looking and supposedly likes girls acts flamingly gay. I'd have no problem if he came out to us and said he was but he always talks about girls. He is still young so if he is , I think he's just scared to come out. I think I'm goning to take him To Coloseum, maybe that will bring out the truth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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