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i have a problem... anyone care to offer some advise??? ok.. im desperate... HELP!


djmoonshine

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lol.. ok.. so heres the problem i have... hopefully one of you nice people will offer up some advise...

soo... whenever i see a beautiful boy, i get tongue tied and i cant think of anything to say to him... everything i think of sounds really dumb, and then when he leaves i regret not saying anything...

guys i feel your pain, since its like customary for guys to make the first move... i have no problem making the first move.. if i freakin knew how to...

help... someone, anyone??:confused:

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1) eyecontact

2) smile

3) walk over to em if there is distance

keeping eye contant and smile in good standards

75% guys will turn their head away...thats a sad

human response to eye contact.

4) when your closer reistablish contact if broken

5) A simple formal greeting...lines are childish

a simple hello will suffice.

6) act normal from there..

do not try to act sexy, funny, extroverted, or introvertned unless that is your natural personality.

well...thats my personal preference on how a first impression should go.

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Guest xfactor834

Sweetie, just act like yourself. Don't change how you are just for some 'beautiful boy'.

Don't do anything you wouldn't do if he wasn't there.

Here's my secret: If you KNOW that you're gonna see him/her again, then there is absolutely no point to push the matter any further.

You can simply smile, say hi, ask for his name and give him yours, and say "I'll see you later".

This is perfect for school, or a neighborhood, or even workplace if you know you're gonna come back to the store.

Anyway, after establishing some sort of "familiarity" with the other person, talking to him/her will be second nature.

Such as, "Hi, are you having a good day?" If he/she says no, you can always suggest a break for some ice cream.

Never use lines. They're pointless unless you're talking to a whore or a man-whore.

Be yourself sweetie!!!!!

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it's really crazy cause i don't have a problem talking to new people... once we're introduced or aquainted, im fine.. it's just that damn first line that chokes me up... all that crap about first impressions... :blown:

ciro... all this talk you do here on cp... lmao! :laugh:

::Sigh:: i'll never figure this stuff out... :mad:

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Originally posted by djmoonshine

lol.. ok.. so heres the problem i have... hopefully one of you nice people will offer up some advise...

soo... whenever i see a beautiful boy, i get tongue tied and i cant think of anything to say to him... everything i think of sounds really dumb, and then when he leaves i regret not saying anything...

guys i feel your pain, since its like customary for guys to make the first move... i have no problem making the first move.. if i freakin knew how to...

help... someone, anyone??:confused:

Guys love when girls come up to them......just do it girl:laugh:
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It's funny cause DJmoonshine sounds exactly like every guy. You think you have it rough. Try being a guy dealing with chickenhead girls who only like guys with money, or guys that stick needles in their asses on a daily basis.

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Originally posted by gothzane

1) eyecontact

2) smile

3) walk over to em if there is distance

keeping eye contant and smile in good standards

75% guys will turn their head away...thats a sad

human response to eye contact.

4) when your closer reistablish contact if broken

5) A simple formal greeting...lines are childish

a simple hello will suffice.

6) act normal from there..

do not try to act sexy, funny, extroverted, or introvertned unless that is your natural personality.

well...thats my personal preference on how a first impression should go.

This is very good advice... I agree a simple HELLO, and name can go a long way... its like 90% mental and 10% physical most people are so negged out or just scared actually let me say worried about rejection that they never actually do it... (except typically the UGLIEST or HAIRIEST ones) but more importantly if just go up and say hello that would work just fine... and if they dont bite they dont bite you swallow your pride and try again...

No biggie...

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I also think Gothzane's advice is good.

Everyone is nervous about talking to people for the first time. Initiating it is putting yourself out there, risking a bit, and putting a certain amount of trust and hope in someone else. That's what makes it tough, but also so cool!

There's only one thing better than getting up the nerve to talk to someone and ending up having a really good conversation and some nice dancing together....

Having a cool, interesting girl come up to you with a smile and say hi and then having that great conversation and dancing.

Most of us boys get tongue tied too - if i can see that its difficult for a girl when she comes up to me, that makes me like her even more --> maybe she doesn't do this all the time? maybe there was something special about me that's flustering her but made her really want to say hi?

go out and have fun!!!!

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Heh Sweetie :o)

I haven't been around but for some reason I decided to look in on CP today.

And how could I resist a plea for Help from sweet Moonshine :o)

I think that there is something you are failing to understand. You might be imagining that boys view girls the same way girls view boys. But it doesn't work that way.

For whatever cultural / biological reasons, Women need to be impressed by their men most of the time in some way or another. There is still that element of proving yourself. Yeah, in the end a good heart and good values do matter. But there is no question that bye-and-large the "cool" factor does matter when meeting girls.

Not so much with guys looking at girls though. Sure, being cool or smart or classy all help. But really, guys are way more forgiving of a girl being tongue-tied or seeming dorky. Our ability to be sexually attracted to a woman is not hinged on getting this superficial feeling of strength , authority, or power from a woman. We cut dorkiness tons of slack in girls and sometimes think its cute.

So don't worry at all. You are a babe. I've met you and you aren't retarded or anything. In fact you are cute as hell and very charming. Really, its the guys who have to worry about becoming total idiots around you.

Lata,

mrdick

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Originally posted by mrdick

Heh Sweetie :o)

I haven't been around but for some reason I decided to look in on CP today.

And how could I resist a plea for Help from sweet Moonshine :o)

I think that there is something you are failing to understand. You might be imagining that boys view girls the same way girls view boys. But it doesn't work that way.

For whatever cultural / biological reasons, Women need to be impressed by their men most of the time in some way or another. There is still that element of proving yourself. Yeah, in the end a good heart and good values do matter. But there is no question that bye-and-large the "cool" factor does matter when meeting girls.

Not so much with guys looking at girls though. Sure, being cool or smart or classy all help. But really, guys are way more forgiving of a girl being tongue-tied or seeming dorky. Our ability to be sexually attracted to a woman is not hinged on getting this superficial feeling of strength , authority, or power from a woman. We cut dorkiness tons of slack in girls and sometimes think its cute.

So don't worry at all. You are a babe. I've met you and you aren't retarded or anything. In fact you are cute as hell and very charming. Really, its the guys who have to worry about becoming total idiots around you.

Lata,

mrdick

Exactly!!!

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O.K. this may sound a little Fu(ked up but.... :eek: try out your skills on a target a little less intimidating. (Talk to a guy that you may not find OH so attractive, to build up your confidence). Build up your conversation skills and gradually reach the goal you want.... If you can get past your fear of rejection then you wont be afraid to talk to anyone.

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Are you ugly? Unless your ugly I don't see what you really have to worry about. What usually works is when you walk up to them and say, "I PUT OUT!". Get's em everytime, sometimes even when your ugly.

For real girl,

I never have really had this problem. I figured that if the guy wanted me bad enough he would come talk to me. I'm not really into shy guys so it kinda weeded those out. Just be honest, approach him, and if you are tounge tied then don't worry about it. Things will work out if they are supposed to. Plan out now in your head things you would want to say. That way you have a back up plan. Everyone makes an ass of themselves once in a while. Just make sure you be yourself, you don't want to be all fake and then a couple weeks later he realized he doesn't like the real you. Good luck!

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Originally posted by djmoonshine

lol.. ok.. so heres the problem i have... hopefully one of you nice people will offer up some advise...

soo... whenever i see a beautiful boy, i get tongue tied and i cant think of anything to say to him... everything i think of sounds really dumb, and then when he leaves i regret not saying anything...

guys i feel your pain, since its like customary for guys to make the first move... i have no problem making the first move.. if i freakin knew how to...

help... someone, anyone??:confused:

ill teach you , if you teach me ;)

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ok

well here is the lowdown, personally i never seen you nor, even spoken to you for more then 5 secs. BUT, i experienced the other end of the game, a girl came up to me and tried to pick me up, (i guess)... and im not hot shit nor good looking, personally i think i look like shit :*(****... but out of those two times.... well let me explain them one by one... the first time a girl came up to me, she was straight up like give me the inpression "i want to rape you" she asked me for my number, and i got kinda shocked and scared that i said "my mother dont let me talk to girls nor like to have girls calling me" this is when i was 20, lol.. i have no idea why i said that, but i did... she gave me back a very "wtf?" look. that, you DO NOT DO... dont be soo pushy about it... a hello will diffinately do.

second girl that came up to me. blah blah blah, we picked me up, and yada yada yada. we went out for a bit, but i guess she wasnt all she crack up to me, but thats another story, what im trying to get here is... in the beginning i thought it will be wonderful to have a girl come up to you. but after a while, i got kinda turned off...

sooooooooo in conclusion (i know your eyeballs probably hurt by now) is that let things flow.. do you know any of his friends? have someone introduced you, so it wont be soo wierd... if he is someone you dont know... just dance by him and see if he looks at you... if he does... he definately likes what he sees... then make eye contact, and dance rite towards him, and see if he is still watching you... if he is.. smile and dance right in front of him, if he doesnt respond to that then he is either not intrested or gay, or he has some malfunction in his brain or body...

that is my advice... dont have to listen to me... but thats what goes thru my head... damn my fingures hurt from all this typing... i think my letter "t" button is fading.

tony

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