phrankadelic Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 ok. i know most of you have already one this one time or another. In the spirit of Valentines Day and all the booty calls associated with it, I thought this was fitting.THE PRE-BOOTY CALL AGREEMENTThis pre-booty call agreement (hereinafter referred to as the "Agreement")is entered into on the _____ day of __________, 2001,by_______________________, between ____________ and______________.THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:1. No sleeping over-unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.3. No calls before 9 PM - we don't have shit to talk about.4. None of that "lovemaking" shit - only sex allowed.5. No emotional discussions (i.e. Where are we heading with this? Do you love me?) The answer is no, so don't ask.6. No plans made in advance - that is why you are called the "backup," unless you are from out-of- town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.7. All gifts accepted - money is always good.8. No baby talk - however, dirty talk is encouraged.9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers - it's really none of your damn business.10. No calling each other "friends with privileges" we are not friends, just sex buddies.11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK - don't be offended.12. No extra clothing - I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.13. No falling asleep right after sex-it's over, so get your ass up, get dressed and go the fuck home.14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it - I don't care.15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "My roommate's girlfriend/boyfriend."17. Doggie style is the preferred position.18. Reason for doggie style: the less eye contact the better.19. No condoms, no fucking. Carry your ass home.20. Bring your own drink - I am not your liquor store.21. No phone use, please - don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass.* EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALLS: The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this Agreement, it will automatically become null and void and you will then be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from phone memory and email list. In other words, you will be BLOCKED from all communications until your silly ass understands the rules.Participating PartySignature_______________________________________ Date: ________________Participating PartySignature_______________________________________ Date: ________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soldado Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 hahahahagood stuff there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mimid Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vanessa23 Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 Funny shit! :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laliux Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 awesome!I already printed it out. hehehehehehe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naomi1 Posted February 8 Report Share Posted February 8 :laugh: :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brocklanders Posted February 9 Report Share Posted February 9 That is some funny shit!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digital7 Posted February 9 Report Share Posted February 9 LMAO :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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