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lollib

I know this has been a topic before

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But why is it so hard for a woman to have an orgasm during sex? My boyfriend is getting frustrated but I just dont know what to do. THe only way I really do is when I pleasure myself. I keep telling him that most women dont but he said he doesnt want to hear about most women. Anyone have any pointers?

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Originally posted by hoke

I think the main reason most sex does not lead to female orgasm is that the clitoris gets severely neglected.

thats what his hands are for & thats what i mean by tease. if youre having sex, have him stop for a little bit and play with your clit with his hands while hes inside you then switch...

some people have told me it is easier for them to cum if the person only focuses on one thing but for me, i want everything :D

it is pretty subjective but i think you should try, works for me. it also depends on the guy, some guys just dont touch you right. they can do exactly what im sayng above and its not pleasurable, also, the more turned on the easier it is to get off and the better the orgasm, maybe your man doesnt turn you on THAT much. :confused:

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its interesting with my current GF..she has multiple orgasms mainly when she is on top...she'll be on top and lean forward and almost hug me and ill hold onto her and that particular angle she cums and cums and cums...perhaps it hits her gspot..i dunno..female orgasms are fucking beautifull...especially the look on their face of pure extasy and when you are done after a nice long fucking its like they are in a dream world...

yum yum :)

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about the mental aspect of it:

both men and women have performance anxiety... in fact, more and more YOUNGER men these days are having problems getting or sustaining erections because of the perceived pressure from women who feel more comfortable demanding more attention and more pleasure from their partners these days.

anyway, if you repeat to yourself "oh god i can't come he must think i'm frigid this sucks i feel so bad he must be bored and frustrated why can't i come argghghhh" you probably won't have an orgasm.

talk with your partner, read some literature, get into the mood, and then relax ... let your lover explore your body slowly and thoroughly but without the expectation of having you climax. sex should be about the journey, not the destination of someone's orgasm. sure it feels good, but so should everything else.

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Originally posted by lollib

But why is it so hard for a woman to have an orgasm during sex? My boyfriend is getting frustrated but I just dont know what to do. THe only way I really do is when I pleasure myself. I keep telling him that most women dont but he said he doesnt want to hear about most women. Anyone have any pointers?

I know this might sound weird........but do you know any guys that experience this (roles reversed I mean). I go for over an hour non-stop and she's beyond satisfied (many times over)..........but I'm still going, this might sound like every girl's dream here, but I'm starting to get a little worried about this, and frustrated to say the least. You know those sprays they have to desensitize guys so they last longer..........yeah, I need the opposite.

btw - this is not a joke, I'm serious

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100% moron proof way to make a girl climax. Get your notebook.

#1 This one works 99% of the time. While the guy is on top, scoot yourself so your almost underneath her with her legs up on your arms. Then get yourself real close and grab her legs real tight and slide her up and down your without pulling out at all. This way she's rubbing her clit up and down the base of your shaft.

If this fails your probably not doing it right, but for the sake of argument.

#2 This never fails unless she wants it to. While on top put her legs up in the air and start fucking her real slow in a circular motion. While your doing that one of you needs to be playing with her clit, ( I personally prefer it's her). When she starts getting in a groove lie you chest really tight on hers( this is incredibly intimate and hot) and reach your hands around behind her ass and spread her cheeks. Now this is where it gets tricky, get your finger wet, by this point she better be wet, or you should give up and become a priest, and start circling her asshole. This should do the trick, if she's a freak(which is the way i like it than feel free to stick your finger right up her ass, this will cause massive gushing and guaranteed future sex.

Be careful not to spoil them though, they fall in love quickly when you get them off good.

I love you guys and hope this helps.:D

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Originally posted by wideskies

sex should be about the journey, not the destination of someone's orgasm. sure it feels good, but so should everything else.

Yes, I know this too. Cause he was like, if you dont orgasm, why do you want to have sex all the time? I like being intimate with him and I told him that it isnt always about getting off. Although once in a while would be nice. Thanks for all the tips- I'll have to try some out next time!

;)

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I have head that the reason why some girls have a probelm with cumming during sex is because they dont have a secure feeling about the whole situation, meaning trust in the relationship, her mind is wandering about diferent things within the relationship.idk if its right, but thats what I have heard...also dont ignore the clit......it should be a mans bestfriend...

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Damn 'boywonder' is a real wonder.... I'm sitting here, trying to imagine his positions and they soooo don't get me hot...and another question that comes to my mind...what is the 99% based on :confused:

lollib:

First of all, you should not focus too much on getting an orgasm. From your post it sounds that you and your boyfriend are far too much thinking about it. The more he makes a big drama out of it, the more tense you get and nothing is going to happen this way. Referring to gambitrah's advice, I have to admit that being on top is a sure way for me (then again, I don't have any problems with it so I my advise might not be too valid here...sorry). Just relax and as many others said, it's about the experienc itself...it's the journey not the destiny, that is important :)

ou812...I know what you mean. One of my exe's would go for hours, while I was already in a state of sleepiness. I don't know if there is anything that can be done.... except, find the right partner with whom you are in sync... then it all comes together ;)l

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Originally posted by flying_high

lollib:

First of all, you should not focus too much on getting an orgasm. From your post it sounds that you and your boyfriend are far too much thinking about it. The more he makes a big drama out of it, the more tense you get and nothing is going to happen this way. Referring to gambitrah's advice, I have to admit that being on top is a sure way for me (then again, I don't have any problems with it so I my advise might not be too valid here...sorry). Just relax and as many others said, it's about the experienc itself...it's the journey not the destiny, that is important :)

Well, we've been together for about 8 months and it isnt until recently that he has really wondered about it. I know it isnt just about having an orgasm cause if that were the case, I would never want to have sex. I guess I just cant think about it that much. I am comfortable with him and trust him so randall I dont think that is it. I guess next time, I will just have to not really focus on anything.

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Originally posted by hoke

I think the main reason most sex does not lead to female orgasm is that the clitoris gets severely neglected.

Yup, it is mental also, but sometime youhave to get the orgasm yourself. Try being on top............ good luck :hump:

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Originally posted by lollib

Yes, I know this too. Cause he was like, if you dont orgasm, why do you want to have sex all the time? ;)

Leave it to a guy to ask a silly question like that.

So far the only ways I've cum during actual intercourse is by using a vibrator or by rubbing my clit... altho I've come close other ways... Good luck in your journey!!! :D

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although i haven't necessarily hit the clit often, i've still made almost all of the girls i've been with cum and cum often. (i've got a policy - for every one time i cum the girl has to have gone at least three times. ;) work ethic.)

Find the Gspot and nail it! :) That's what i do.

It's all about HOW you use the dick, not just the fact that you're using it.

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Originally posted by cintron

although i haven't necessarily hit the clit often, i've still made almost all of the girls i've been with cum and cum often. (i've got a policy - for every one time i cum the girl has to have gone at least three times. ;) work ethic.)

Find the Gspot and nail it! :) That's what i do.

It's all about HOW you use the dick, not just the fact that you're using it.

WERD................... :D:cool::);)

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