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is anyone going through what i'm going through


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I was running a stint of about 2 year relationship... bad bad bad break up..

we both hate each other now..and won't speak to each other..

her wings have been clipped,.. she's originally from upstate NY and now in Jersey.... she came down to live w/ me and now w/ her new found freedom she says...C ya... and is running off to someone else's apartment to rent for free.. (she was renting free at my place too) obviously ..she was my gf.

Well in any event..just wanted to see if anyone was going through similar Shi*!* that I am and would like to share experiences...

It's a learing lesson ... she had much insecurities and trust issue to begin w/ ... I've done my best to show unwavering and unconditional love..

but i guess it's true what they say in that movie Alexander the Great..

"people are like snakes.... you can tend and care for them all their lives..and one day they will just turn on you"......

"Those that love too much will lose it...those that love with Irony lasts"..

Well maybe i am just venting my anger at the fact that she broke into my bedroom (after we split she had her own bedroom in the same house)... and she tore up ALL the pictures she could find of my Ex gf's and letters and cards that were sent to me...

Mutalated the Teddy Bears we gave each other for Valentines Day 2003/2004...

placed the mutalated bear and roses on my bed with a note reading:::

"Sleep on these Bed of Roses Ass hole"..

She got mad b/c I left the house and mad plans w/ my friend to see the movie alexander the GREAT w/o talking to her..

isn't that what your supposed to do anyway once someone breaks up w/ you...ignore them??!!!

She found out that I had had two instances in which I was in a state if infidelity.... which really made our relationship much more of a roller coaster..

My instances were Feb and april of 2003 in which our relationship and commitment level was not or has not matured to the point in which it was during 2004 and when she truly decided to move in w/ me and actually moved in with me....

As bad as it may sound..and I'm sure there are women reading this and saying that i got what i deserverd..

but wait there is more to the story..i later found out just very recent that

she was hooking up w/ somoeone on June28th which is of course more recent than mine..

as well as when she did move in w/ me in july of 2004 she was totally mysteriously coming home at 3am saying she was in a hot tub w/ 2 guys smoking pot... and that nothing happened and for me not to worry about it???

And also disappearing for a whole weekend w/o telling me, up until i called her...saying that she just wanted to be w/. friends...whom the friends i found out was a guy she had already hooked up w/ earlier in the beginning of our relationship..

now now you guys might be thinking that why was i still w/ her when all this happenned...

I excused alot of the things she did, b/c she was young... (don't worry she's not under 18. )

well now to make the long story even longer..she has been hooking up w/ females.. which is all fine w/ me...I can respect someone going through stage or a phase or maybe just a total permanent change..

but the fact that she brought home this girl to MY HOUSE and slept over..

Really killed me..i almost LOST IT.. luckily for them.. i did not see them that night or the morning after... Not only that she totally disrespects me by bringing this gay guy friend she makes out w/ in front of me on my porch...

She is supposed to move out after the finals or during the finals... which believe me... can't come any sooner..

in any event...

it's still hard b/c there were moments that were truly cherishable and it's hard b/c for crying out loud this is the girl I thought i was going to Marry and have KIDS WITH!!!

Dreams and fairy tales.. ah such dreams are hard and painful to die...

so anyway... for those of you who have issue of affairs of the heart..

I'm sure my troubles and worries make your troubles seem much more bearable.

Just say "thank god I'm not this kid"..

Believe me it's not fun being me right now..

the good side of the coin is that I have learned to be humble and true to myself... and to be kind in the moment of which most people would have contempt and hatred..

In the end it's KINDNESS that matters most...

also then i can look forward to going out and meeting someone new..

perhaps not jumping to a relationship but meeting people at clubs to dance and have drinks w/ and meet up again and again weekend after weekend..is fun..

Yeah i miss those days in TWILO, SF, Hunkbunka, Abyss, Exit, ARC, Vinyl..

oh man Vinyl..

it's been a long 2years coming.... but it's time for me to whip myself back into shape and put on those dancing shoes once more...

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Oh and wait I also found a note she was exchanging w/ a friend during school that READ..

"..yeah this class sucks I don't even know what to freaking write about in this paper...etc..etc.. ..and the guy (can't name names) just bought a house but doesn't like it and is already selling it and is planning to get an apartment one town over and he says to just be a cold hard bitch and tell him I love him,... But GRRR it's hard because I don't like him nor am i attracted to him anymore..." <--talking about me..

I read this about just 2 weeks ago.. you can imagine my HURT and devastation.. she had wrote this i suspect back in September...

when she was living with me and was my girl friend..

so that whole time she was just pretending to love me just so when the time was right for her she was just going to LEAVE me...

man... I was Fucking HURT so bad.. but more relieved b/c i thought i was the one that fucked up on the relationship when she found out about my instances back in 2003...

I realized that i wasn't really losing anyone special...Such a shame.. such a shame..

I mean i really really really LOVED this girl sooo fuckin' much BEYOND belief...

such a shame.. Oh well..

All i can say is that what was once told to me by somoneone special..

"As long as you dance and move you shall never stumble..."

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WOW!!! listen bro, i have been there. it was with a girl that i was with for over four years! simlar sit. she was young to. not under 18 either! but young in the head! but let me tell you being single is so so so so much fun! just go out have fun do anything and everything for you! be a little selfish it will help you get over the ex! and before you know it you will meet someone new! but have your fun first and get over your ex before you start something new! i followed this advise and had a great great time while i was single and then bam met a awsome girl!! anyway just my 2 cents! good luck!!!! and to keep your sanity cut her completly off. believe me it will be real hard. especially if you get those late drunk or whatever phone calls! dont do it!! many more fish in the sea!!!! peace!!

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"Never trust a big butt and a smile... That girl is poison..!"

Thats some fucked up shit man, sorry to hear about it. Best thing is to try and move on and get right back out there- dont get depressed and mope around, life is too short. Call up your boys, your real friends, whomever and start spending some time with some of the people that really matter and will always be there. I dont know how old you are but it sounds like your still young so, just fuck it man, get back out there and live your life.

Sometime down the road (maybe a month maybe 5 yrs), she will realize that she fucked up and lost a good thing and that will come back to bite her in the ass- shady bitch!

(sorry about the rant- its my psych degree talkin...)

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i would totally change the locks and throw her shit in the street, keep all her jewlery and sell it on ebay, then a month from now call her up and tell her you have AIDS...that'll show her.. :)

o and get the number of her future boyfreind, have a female keep calling when hes not home..

i did this for a freind once,worked wonders, i called his ex girlfreinds house, her sister picked up, i asked if her current(the sisters, his x's) boyfreind was there, in my most concered voice i asked if she knew where he was , how i could get in touch wiht him, then i was like, please i need to leave a message, i started to "cry" i was telling her how iv been trying to call all the numbers in his phone, then i told her that i was preganant, i need to talk to him, i don't have any money fro an abortion... :lol3: i was very convincing...

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i would totally change the locks and throw her shit in the street, keep all her jewlery and sell it on ebay, then a month from now call her up and tell her you have AIDS...that'll show her.. :)

o and get the number of her future boyfreind, have a female keep calling when hes not home..

i did this for a freind once,worked wonders, i called his ex girlfreinds house, her sister picked up, i asked if her current(the sisters, his x's) boyfreind was there, in my most concered voice i asked if she knew where he was , how i could get in touch wiht him, then i was like, please i need to leave a message, i started to "cry" i was telling her how iv been trying to call all the numbers in his phone, then i told her that i was preganant, i need to talk to him, i don't have any money fro an abortion... :lol3: i was very convincing...

Nice good advice...LOL...it's definetly a thought..

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and thanks for the rest of you guys that responded and showed your support..

tonight i wwent to a local club and it was sweet...met up w/ old friends and just p.r'd for a little bit w/ the bartender who i find out is seeing someone for the last 9 mo's

no biggy though, b/c she is mad cool and i'd love to chill and just be friends w/ her..

but yeah going out and chillin' is the best medicine..and living life and feeling good about youreslf is the best revenge. :)

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Theres several ways to handle this.

The good mans way: Change the locks, change your phone numbers. Move on with your life, and forget about her.

The real mans way: Invite her over to "make up". Have that great make up sex. Make sure its really nasty sex too. She sounds like a pig, so this should be easy. Maybe give her a dirty sanchez (that parts up to you). During this process, be sure to be recording the entire thing. Once done recording, encode the file in DivX format, and then upload it to the internet. If you need help with this, PM me and I'll gladly assist you. Upload the divX to me if you'd like, and I'll post it for all of clubplanet to enjoy. Believe me, a year from now you'll wish you did this, especially once you hear about all the other shit she's done behind your back.

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holy shit its me on your avatar, damn dude, obvioulsy nothing better to do huh. And yo gambit what a story but see what hell that was you went thru. She sounds like a nut and better to see this now than later. Your still young so have fun. Dont let this shit sweat you.

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Theres several ways to handle this.

The good mans way: Change the locks, change your phone numbers. Move on with your life, and forget about her.

The real mans way: Invite her over to "make up". Have that great make up sex. Make sure its really nasty sex too. She sounds like a pig, so this should be easy. Maybe give her a dirty sanchez (that parts up to you). During this process, be sure to be recording the entire thing. Once done recording, encode the file in DivX format, and then upload it to the internet. If you need help with this, PM me and I'll gladly assist you. Upload the divX to me if you'd like, and I'll post it for all of clubplanet to enjoy. Believe me, a year from now you'll wish you did this, especially once you hear about all the other shit she's done behind your back.

SWEET!!! good idea!!!!!!!

im trying to get this bitch i hate a dwi, she always gets drunk, pukes ythen drives around her neighbour hood, my x bf won't let me though... but next time i see her im calling the cops regaurdless 70/30 chance shell be drunk.. heheheheh

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Dude, I'm sorry about everything, but the first thing you did wrong was not charging the girl rent in the first place. Number 1, you are not her mom or dad, no matter how much you care about her she has to realize there are no free lunches in life. You don't want to be stuck with someone totally reliant on you for the rest of your life anyway. For her to give you SOMETHING (besides sex and good conversation) to show you that she could pull her own weight and would show that she would put forth effort to take care of you.

She sounds like a taker. Believe me, she did you a favor by getting out of your life. You got off cheap.

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women can be so evil. everyone has been down this road. I have, and what have i learned from it. Appreciate yourself!! that is the number one thing.

anyway, as for putting her up bare ass on the net, i bet she is already out there. my advice, find out what she is most allergic too and then smear as much of it all over her underwear. fuck it if you cant hit..... NO ONE CAN!

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women can be so evil. everyone has been down this road. I have, and what have i learned from it. Appreciate yourself!! that is the number one thing. most people starting questioning themselves after dealing with something like this. I know this may sound generic, but it holds true ... it wasnt you man, it was that life sucking whore...

anyway, as for putting her up bare ass on the net, i bet she is already out there. my advice, find out what she is most allergic too and then smear as much of it all over her underwear. fuck it if you cant hit..... NO ONE CAN!

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Bro I feel you're pain,

Some people are so needy that they don't know how to see outside their pain and insecurities to treat someone that has done right by them the right way, they will never be whole inside... the best thing you can do is not let this eat you up-that will do nothing positive.

Take my word for it, I spent months enraged at my ex, but for what? She is what she is and love is a selfish game. If you are angry it's b/c of how this has made you feel about yourself not because you miss her and that's the real issue. Good luck

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Dude, I'm sorry about everything, but the first thing you did wrong was not charging the girl rent in the first place. Number 1, you are not her mom or dad, no matter how much you care about her she has to realize there are no free lunches in life. You don't want to be stuck with someone totally reliant on you for the rest of your life anyway. For her to give you SOMETHING (besides sex and good conversation) to show you that she could pull her own weight and would show that she would put forth effort to take care of you.

She sounds like a taker. Believe me, she did you a favor by getting out of your life. You got off cheap.

I agree...I can't believe guys (and girls) put up with this stuff...my ex wouldn't put up with anything and neither would I...maybe that's why I am single, hehe

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dude as soon as she broke up with you, you shoulda thrown her ass into the street. She's livin in your house rent free? Good god do you let everyone walk all over you like this? And then after all the drama you say she's still cool and you still wanna be friends and hang out with her? hmm, i'm not sure who's more nuts, you or her. sounds like you're doin the right thing so far tho, go out and get on with your life, meet some normal chicks for cryin out loud.

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i would totally change the locks and throw her shit in the street, keep all her jewlery and sell it on ebay, then a month from now call her up and tell her you have AIDS...that'll show her.. :)

o and get the number of her future boyfreind, have a female keep calling when hes not home..

i did this for a freind once,worked wonders, i called his ex girlfreinds house, her sister picked up, i asked if her current(the sisters, his x's) boyfreind was there, in my most concered voice i asked if she knew where he was , how i could get in touch wiht him, then i was like, please i need to leave a message, i started to "cry" i was telling her how iv been trying to call all the numbers in his phone, then i told her that i was preganant, i need to talk to him, i don't have any money fro an abortion... :lol3: i was very convincing...

whoa u sound like a psycho, I'm never datin you :grin3:

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