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Rules You Must Know to Drive in New Jersey....


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1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many

people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before

hitting the orange construction barrels.

2. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real New Jersey

driver never uses them.

3. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

4. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered

"going with the flow."

5. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance

you have of getting hit.

6. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

7. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that

your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedalpulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

8. Construction signs tell you about road closures immediately after

you pass the last exit before the traffic begins to back up.

9. The new electronic traffic warning system signs are not there to

provide useful information. They are only there to make New Jersey look high-tech and to distract you from seeing the police car parked in the median.

10. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

11. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and

are apparently not enforceable in the metro area during rush hour.

12. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a New Jersey driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

13. Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic in New Jersey.

14. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire.

15. Throwing litter on the roads adds variety to the landscape, keeps the existing litter from getting lonely, and gives Adopt-a-highway crews something to clean up.

16. Everybody thinks their vehicle is better than yours, especially

pickup truck drivers with stickers of Calvin peeing on a Ford, Dodge or Chevy logo.

17. Learn to swerve abruptly. New Jersey is the home of high-speed

slalom driving thanks to NJDOT, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.

18. It is traditional in New Jersey to honk your horn at cars that

don't move the instant the light changes.

19. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.

20. Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left

before proceeding.

21. Remember that the goal of every New Jersey driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.

22. Snow, ice, fog, and rain are no reasons to change any of the

previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way ensuring a natural selection process for body shops, junkyards, and new vehicle sales.

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"There was nothing in the world that I ever wanted more than to feel you deep in my heart."

shadowchaser076@aol.com

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Yup, Shadow, we Jerseyans really know how to drive. I was in SoCal for the last couple of years and those fools were actually polite! They would stop at the entrance to an intersection and wait intil there was room on the other side to go through. I will print out your list and share it with my friends down here!

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"There is no beginning and no end, only the infinite passion of life."

-Federico Fellini

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I honestly hate driving in the tri-state area. People can't drive for shit.

Driving in NYC is a gamble. I hate taking cabs in the city....they're a death wish. biggrin.gif

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"There was nothing in the world that I ever wanted more than to feel you deep in my heart."

shadowchaser076@aol.com

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I get crazy sometimes driving in this area, especially when I'm in a bad mood. I think I'm just way to competitive. I try to be nice to people *sometimes* but when they start pissing me off I get that road rage. Only when they do stupid shit like 30 in the left lane. Or even better when they finally do move over for you to pass they magically find that accelerator and start racing you! You know what's funny though, when I'm out of state particularly in quiter areas I can't stand it. No one is in a rush and I get crazy again! But, good thing is, I've noticed that when people see license plates from this area they tend to get out of the way smile.gif

I love driving in the city, it's like a video game! I want to be a race car driver. I know it's not very girly but I love competitive driving.

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OMG!!!!!!!! someone who finally understands.....I just moved to Tampa Fl. from NJ....I still have my Jersey plates....these people are MORONS...their speed limit is 70 and the are doing 65 on all lanes BUT the left lane....which they are doing 55 at BEST. I get soooo annoyed here...I miss driving up where people know how to drive. smile.gif

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Originally posted by flippin_e:

OMG!!!!!!!! someone who finally understands.....I just moved to Tampa Fl. from NJ....I still have my Jersey plates....these people are MORONS...their speed limit is 70 and the are doing 65 on all lanes BUT the left lane....which they are doing 55 at BEST. I get soooo annoyed here...I miss driving up where people know how to drive. smile.gif

OMG, I've driven down there many times and it is HELL. As long as you have those plates be proud and keep representing the Northeast drivers!! smile.gif

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This might sound exceedingly weird to some but i actually LOVE driving in the NY/NJ/PA area that is my new home as of this summer. They may not be pretty but I love the turnpike, parkway, rt.1, metro area bridges (actually *those* are pretty) and whenever I take a long road trip, I rejoice when I see fellow NJ or NY plates on a speeding car next to me in Illinois or South Carolina or something like that.

I think the northeast kicks the rest of the country's collective ass and driving here is just one part of that big butt kicking. How's that for some NJ jingoism?

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"There is no beginning and no end, only the infinite passion of life."

-Federico Fellini

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Originally posted by namastasyai:

This might sound exceedingly weird to some but i actually LOVE driving in the NY/NJ/PA area that is my new home as of this summer. They may not be pretty but I love the turnpike, parkway, rt.1, metro area bridges (actually *those* are pretty) and whenever I take a long road trip, I rejoice when I see fellow NJ or NY plates on a speeding car next to me in Illinois or South Carolina or something like that.

I think the northeast kicks the rest of the country's collective ass and driving here is just one part of that big butt kicking. How's that for some NJ jingoism?

Look at all this Jersey pride, I love it! I can't stand when people bitch about living here.

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LOL! NY/NJ/CT is really the only area of the east coast I LOVE driving in! Carolinas SUCK (esp. low country), SMIBs (Southern Maryland In-Breds) SUCK. Virginia SUCKS. DC is an oversized parking lot. Philly usually is a pimple on the ass of society for driving. Georgia isn't the worst, though I avoid it. Boston is a PITA because there is NO logic to the street layout.

CT? 95 isn't just a road, it's the speed limit there! NYC? A fun rally race, esp. the West Side Highway. The rest of NY? Watch out for the troopers, but at least everyone else is in a hurry, too. LIE can lick my sweaty ass-crack though. And NJ? Well, they are in a class by themselves.

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STFU, Class of 1999

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Speaking of SC, I went down a few months ago with my b/f and another couple from Stat. Isl. My friend from SI swore that they change those horrid southern roads while you're sleeping. We kept getting lost. Another observation he made was that all combined the people there don't have a full set of teeth between them.

One last funny story, we ordered pizza one night and they said it was NY style. When we got it it was this tiny little burned up mess! He called them up furious and said,

"You want to see NY style? I'll come up there and kick your ass NY style!!"

It was probably one of those situations where you had to be there but it was hilarious!

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the south should be allowed to secede now! i spend one month per year in charleston , sc working at a music festival there and the only reason i find it tolerable is that every single person working with me in performance or production is from the north!

Actually there are some great people living there but it just boggles the mind how fabulously bigoted and dumb some of them are. Of course we've certainly got our share of losers up here, just take a look at the flame wars here tonight on the boards against some of you guys who have lived online here longer than i have. But anyway, the pizza story made me laugh... never try to get pizza or bagels in most of the usa!

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"There is no beginning and no end, only the infinite passion of life."

-Federico Fellini

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Ahh, the joy of driving.

I get to put about 1000 miles a week on my car in the metro area. It is a real joy to have to drive in the traffic. It gets me almost bipolar. There are days when I feel like driving like a coked-up taxi driver and then there are days when I could really care less and just poke along in traffic. Granted the poking days are *very* few and far between.

I get aggravated with the people doing less than 75-80 on the Garden State. If you aren't doing 65 on the West Side, get out of the left lane.

When I was in Miami this AM, I had to haul ass up to Ft. Lauderdale airport to get my flight back to NY. The father of the girl I was staying with there jumped in his Boxster S and ran at about 105 MPH up I-95 in the left lane. A Kawasaki sport bike and CLK320 were just ahead of us and traffic moved over like it should. I was impressed. I also drove to Atlanta on Tuesday night (from Miami) and set the cruise just under 80 the whole way. Not a problem. Atlanta sucks, but the rest of the state was ok.

JDogg

(with only 2 pts on the License)

------------------

Freezing my A** off here in cold NY.

Wishing that it was 90 and sunny...ah, Miami!

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That reminds me...I have to turn in the truck that I have now on Oct. 4th. It has 8500 miles on it right now, and I got it July 10th.

Hmmm...what to get...remember that it has to be domestic GM product.

JDogg

------------------

Freezing my A** off here in cold NY.

Wishing that it was 90 and sunny...ah, Miami!

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Originally posted by namastasyai:

the south should be allowed to secede now!...never try to get pizza or bagels in most of the usa!

The South shal rise again! And not soon enough...You are so right about pizza and bagels in the rest of the US. So what do you do for Spoleto?

To jodgg...bitch bitch bitch.

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STFU, Class of 1999

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you really must have no life.. lol

Originally posted by shadowchaser:

1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many

people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before

hitting the orange construction barrels.

2. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real New Jersey

driver never uses them.

3. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

4. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is considered

"going with the flow."

5. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance

you have of getting hit.

6. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

7. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that

your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedalpulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

8. Construction signs tell you about road closures immediately after

you pass the last exit before the traffic begins to back up.

9. The new electronic traffic warning system signs are not there to

provide useful information. They are only there to make New Jersey look high-tech and to distract you from seeing the police car parked in the median.

10. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.

11. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and

are apparently not enforceable in the metro area during rush hour.

12. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a New Jersey driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

13. Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic in New Jersey.

14. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tire.

15. Throwing litter on the roads adds variety to the landscape, keeps the existing litter from getting lonely, and gives Adopt-a-highway crews something to clean up.

16. Everybody thinks their vehicle is better than yours, especially

pickup truck drivers with stickers of Calvin peeing on a Ford, Dodge or Chevy logo.

17. Learn to swerve abruptly. New Jersey is the home of high-speed

slalom driving thanks to NJDOT, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes.

18. It is traditional in New Jersey to honk your horn at cars that

don't move the instant the light changes.

19. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.

20. Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left

before proceeding.

21. Remember that the goal of every New Jersey driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.

22. Snow, ice, fog, and rain are no reasons to change any of the

previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way ensuring a natural selection process for body shops, junkyards, and new vehicle sales.

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Answer this for me...do expensive cars come with turn signals? It seems that if someone is driving a BMW, Mercedes, etc. they didn't buy the turn signal option when they bought the car. I wish these A-HOLES would learn how to use them. I'm sure they're not THAT retarded!

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The energy in the music is what keeps us here, the energy in the music is what we want.

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AHAHAHAHA Lovin It, I drive like a maniac anyway, I have to drive to NJ a couple times a week and often do 95+ on the turnpike...Cab Drivers are the only thing about the metro area that piss me off, they just really don't know how to drive and if the government would give me another job, I'd ask to be High Executioner of Taxi Cab Drivers...

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"Music is my mistress, and she plays second fiddle to no one." Louis Armstrong

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FeelTheseBeats@aol.com

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