Guest bellaragazza Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 i'm not quite sure what to think of this.My boyfriend is constantly and I mean constantly bringing up the fact that he either ran into an ex girlfriend or saw a girl that he had a crush on. I'm starting to get really irritated because it builds a certain amount of insecurity knowing that he's constantly being confronted by women who he was interested in.For example this morning we got together to catch a quick cup of coffee before class and he tells me he bumped into his ex girl and his old crush who he apparently liked for over two years. He was so upset, terrible upset actually and kept telling me how much of a bitch she way. Everywhere we go he tells me that he saw one of his old crushes or that he hates a girl because he used to like her.It may sound overly pathetic but right now i'm really bothered by all this. His main topic of conversation is his ex. He'll always bring her up and make sure I know how she used to do things, or used to act and now i'm starting to wonder if he's over her or not. Maybe he's still trying to deal with the baggage from his old relationship which was over 2 years ago. Anyhow, just wondering if it's normal to be irritated and concerned about this or if i'm just over reacting and should let it go? And if he isn't over it then i'm not so sure it's such a great idea to stay with him. I definately don't want to be in a relationship where i'm constantly being compared to a previous girlfriend or having insecurities that she instilled in him taken out on me. I'm just scared that he's in this with me because he doesn't want to be alone anymore.Any thoughts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happykittn Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 It's his issue... explain that it makes you uncomfortable to talk about it, and that you'd appreciate it if he wouldn't bring anything like that up again unless it's really important. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somebitch Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 shit, i know how you feel. when someone is complimenting other people and talking about how badly they want/wanted them it makes you feel insignificant. this guy ive been talking to always talks about girls he wants. he will say he would do anything to be with some chick that his ex was friends with or his ex's sister. i mean honestly it makes me question his character... it's one thing to see a hot girl on the street and say shes hot but it's another to say you would give your nut to be with your ex's sister who you're friends with. i'm sure if the opportunity came up he would jump on it without a thought... it kinda sux but on the other hand i dont want anything serious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bellaragazza Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 yeah i totally know how you feel.sometimes i just feel like asking him why the fuck he even bothered to get with me if he's still got issues with that other chick. It's hard to sit there day after day and be sympathetic to his feelings when all he can do is blab about his ex's. It's scary too actually, maybe one day they'll get back together and since they have such a long obviously emotional history i'd be out in a second if he could get back with her.And the worst thing of all is that I refuse to ask him what his intentions are or for that matter tell him it bothers me because I don't want to come off as overly insecure or needy. He's a great guy, don't get me wrong but it's still in the early stages of our relationship so i'd rather find out what's up with everything now and not in a year when I get my assed dump because his ex is ready to get back into a relationship. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flying_high Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 I totally understand you but I think you should talk to him. Maybe he isn't even aware of what he is doing or the way he comes across. Sometimes guys just like to talk about those things without realizing that the new partner might be hurt by these things.Even though it might be the beginning of your relationship, constant talk about the ex isn't really too exciting and interesting. I don't think you would come across as overly needy or insecure...just you need to know where you two stand and what's this all about.Hope everything works out and GOOD LUCK!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tastyt Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 Originally posted by somebitch shit, i know how you feel. when someone is complimenting other people and talking about how badly they want/wanted them it makes you feel insignificant. this guy ive been talking to always talks about girls he wants. he will say he would do anything to be with some chick that his ex was friends with or his ex's sister. Why do men do that? Why why why? We could start a whole new message board on "why men do the things they do." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bellaragazza Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 sometimes i questions a mans brain capacity.just like we avoid blabbing about ex boyfriends, crushes or hot guys and whatnot because they don't like hearing it they should know better than to fill our heads with it.I'm really starting to think it's a jealousy thing, they want to see what it takes to piss off a girl. It's probably some wierd way of feeling wanted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shugabooga Posted February 4 Report Share Posted February 4 it's rude and immature. he needs to grow up and treat you nicer or else hit the road! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reliant Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 Originally posted by shugabooga it's rude and immature. he needs to grow up and treat you nicer or else hit the road! Ill second that ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acura Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 I hate when I go out with a girl and they constatnly bring up X's. For some reason I seem to attract the girls on the rebound so this is AAALLLLLLLL i hear about i dunno, I don't really talk about X's when I am with someone new so it bothers me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bellaragazza Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 Originally posted by legend38 I hate when I go out with a girl and they constatnly bring up X's. For some reason I seem to attract the girls on the rebound so this is AAALLLLLLLL i hear about i dunno, I don't really talk about X's when I am with someone new so it bothers me. yeah well you should teach my boyfriend not to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momadance Posted February 5 Report Share Posted February 5 Originally posted by tastyt Why do men do that? Why why why? We could start a whole new message board on "why men do the things they do." because 95% of guys are hopeless around beautiful women. -- Make that 85%, because supposedly 10% are homosexual.and when i say hopeless, i mean it in the most pathetic way Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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