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Funny Pick Up Lines


nomembername

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btw evan,

quote:

"The girls love it because it shows u care and are willing to give them things"

you don´t have to give things to girls to make them want you. whatever that is, dinners, drinks, etc.

girls always SAY this, but when you look at reality you´ll see that the guys that regularly fuck hot girls do not buy them drinks and the likes.

it is one thing if you buy/give them things because you WANT to. that is okay. but when you buy them things and EXPECT something of it, you´re in for a lot of failures. cause then you treat women like prostitutes. substitue the money you give prostitutes for sex with dinners/gifts/cars, you basically still have the same thing

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  • 4 weeks later...

"Wanna see a trick I learned in prison?"

"How much were your breasts?"

"are you drunk or is that just a lazy eye?"

"I'd like to park my corrective shoes underneath your bed"

"You mind if I stay here until it's safe back there where I farted?"

"excuse for asking, and no I'm not making a pass, but you must be leaving the country if you are packing that much ass."

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"I was about to go masturbate and I needed a name to go with your face."

"My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in."

"You remind me of a championship bass, I don't know whether to mount you or eat you!"

"I'm not too good at algebra, but doesn't U+I = 69?"

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GOOD DAY FOR WEATHER!

Hi there! Do you want to see something really swell?

Do you have rubbers at your house or should I just pull out?

Damn, I thought "Very Fine" only came in a bottle!

I'll slay a dragon for you!

Why don't we go behind a rock and get a little boulder!

Do you mind if I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?

My name is Pogo, do you wanna jump on my stick?

Is that a run in your stocking or is it the stairway to heaven?

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My personel favorite, for humor not results, although some drunk girls like it

Hey, I have a riddle for you.....

What's got two thumbs and like blow jobs?

(pause wait for effect)

(point to self with both thumbs and say with enthusiasm...) This Guy!

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