how has E changed your life? has it?

[libyagirl]

it is hard to ask this question without sounding campy, but bear with me because i'm truly interested. i want to know if experiencing E has significantly impacted people's lives. if so, how? share your story in any form... poetry or prose.

from my experiences, i find that taking e extinguishes the ego and you are able to reach a state where your consciousness loses it's self-consciousness. from there you are left free to explore many things you are not normally able to.

it has the ability to open a doorway to the collective unconscious. with the right vibes and music you can feel completely one and in tune with the hundreds of people who are there with you to dance the night away. it's an incredibly powerful feeling that i believe creates a domino effect into our daily lives.

i find i'm a much more open person now. over the years i've created layers of shells to protect myself from the outside world. i experimented and observed life from afar. but now i'm able to let the world in and truly live. like it use to be when i was a child.

i know i know... but i warned you it would be hard not to sound cheesy. maybe i'm still in my honeymoon stage with MDMA. who knows how i will feel a year down this road.

[boa_boy]

Sounds like you're definitely still a honeymooner I think I agree with your sentiments though I am well past the 'evangelist' stage of e use (4 yrs now...)......I went through the more more more approach (hey my flatmate was selling hundreds ) but now I try only to have it once or twice a month....the key is not to have it ALL the time.....

Oh well back to work now

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..................coming soon to a dancefloor near you------------------> boa_boy@yahoo.com

[trance604]

I tihnk everyone, me included goes hrough a phase right after their first few uses of MDMA. its a phase where you loved rolling so much that you wanna do it all the time, you think about it almost half the day...you do it too often , every few nights..and then it starts to suck and you experieence widthdrawal....those first few weeks you feel like a different person.

Someone explained this once before, something about being a light sleeper as your serotonin is depleted...you can remember dreams also...i thought it was wonderful how i could wake up and remember 3 different dreams..i never can remember them...after a month of non usage i was back to normal however..and i realize that this substance is not one that can really change your life and outlook on the world...it makes you fake, puts you in a different state and your mind ALMOST believes it too...

[Guest crystalmethodny]

Im not going to release how much E I've done, or how long, quantities, etc...

But despite your delusions of illusions, the one thing I feel most is... a step down. I still feel as if this light haze has covered my brain and somehow clouded the most miniscule of perceptions, judgement, empathy, and memories.

Thats just me. Im not really Anti-E, since I do love that good feeling it is... but, I'm pro-moderation. So be safe and don't overdo it.

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"We're going to build things up slowly... are you with me? Here we go."

[Guest crystalmethodny]

Oh and, I stopped doing it all, completely.

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"We're going to build things up slowly... are you with me? Here we go."

[kitty19]

i also agree with the previous posts. for the first couple of months, everything you see, there is a correlation to E. you tell everyone about this great drug you found, and want to share it with your close friends.

it wears off, and the significant difference i've noticed in my life?

i have less money.

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*kitty19*

*turn it around baby*

[Quest]

The letter E always stands out when I'm reading something... Bizzarre!

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When it's all said and done, we've still got the music.

[sival106x]

i find myself being broke a lot more often now haha

[forthemusic]

Whats E done?

Well, it's given Guiliani justification to fuck with any venue in NY that plays electronic music.

It's also fucked up alot of peoples lives.

Just two weeks ago it killed some kid at TWILO. He may have had health problems or whatever, but the point is, he took E and died.

And dont start with all that stuff about bad pills being sold in the club either, no one eles carried out and rushed to the hospital.

If it was someone dealing bad pills, other people would have got real sick too.

Or was it some mysterious dealer who went to TWILO to sell ONE bad pill? (sure)

I dont buy this shit on this board.

One dayeveryone says, Drugs are fucking up our scene, we all go out for the music not the drugs. A weed later your talking about your BULLSHIT "Spiritual Awakening on E"

If your life has really changed that much from taking some freakin chemical than you must have had a pretty empty life to begin with.

People go out to "ROLL" and get all fucked up, and people like myself who actual go out for the music NOT the drugs suffer.

Roll at home, and leave the clubs for the music and the people who love it.

E is just a drug,just like Heroin or Coke or BOAT for that matter.

Of course it makes you feel good, so does smack. Did you rush out and try that too?

And dont even start with all that bullshit RESEARCH you did and how "safe" E is. Erowid and Dacesafe and shit. Who runs these sites? People who are OBVIOUSLY partial to the drug scene in a big way.

You people are just trying to fooling yourselves and each other.

Why dont you go to BLUELIGHT with all the other first time ecstacy users and trade stories about "TRICKS FOR BLOWING UP" and "THE FIRST TIME I SMOKED A MENTHOL ON E" and all that STUPID shit they talk about.

Go ahead and flame me, just remember what I said when your friend OD's or you get diagnosed with some medical condition for abusing your bodies with that shit.

Even those druggie sites like Bluelight admit that "No one knows the long term effects of MDMA usage." No one.

This may soud a little harsh and I appologize, but someone needs to say it.

When TWILO, or FACTORY or what ever club you hang out at gets shut down (and it WILL), we will have people like you to thank.

I hear all this stuff about B&T and the JUICEHEADS hurting the scene, but what about EVERYONE who is going for the drugs, including ravers, club kids, etc.

The drugs are whats going to ruin it all.

[apdiddy]

i think most people here are concentrating on the physical effects they've experienced with e. as far as mental goes, when i first started doing e, it was just to party with. but the process of communicating with good friends while on and after e really opened up a lot of doors. i learned a lot about myself, about my friends, and about what life is all about. i believe e can be really therepautic for many people with many diffenent psychological conditions, and it had been used by psychiatrists in europe a while back.i believe e has had a really significant effect on my life, and an absolutely positive one.

sometimes i believe that when people say i cant feel e anymore and what not is because the initial experience with e changes you so profoundly that after that period has elasped you feel as if its not doing anything for you anymore.

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deez nuts

[randy0159]

Hey music dude, I hear ya, but drugs have been in every counter culture since, um. well, forever. They ain't going away. Many people find counter cultures to escape reality and oh boy drugs help that out even more.

It cannot be denied that some drugs have been instrumenatl in the development of the music you hold dearly. What music are you into? It doesn't matter. Give me any genre and I will find you some brilliant songs that go as far as having drug references in vocals and/or the title.

Have a few bad personal experiences? Taht would explain the harsh attitude

[blueangel]

I have to agree with pooH on this one. I don't consider myself to be a drug expert or anyting like that. I'm sure there are PLENTY of members on here who have done a lot more and a lot longer than I have, so they're much more knowledge then me.

All I can say is that before I really started experimenting with drugs, I was very closed minded and stuck up about the whole thing along with a lot of other scenes. I was ultra conservative and probably didn't allow myself to meet that many new people because of that. It allowed me to let my guards down and look at life in a new way. Having said that . . . by no means am I saying that I was a "loser" before dropping. I just needed to see things in a different light in order to appreciate life in a whole new way.

However, I do see a lot of people . . . errr kids, over-doing it. And I'm sure eventually killing the experience. Moderation, is really the key. If you over-do ANYTHING then you're really just killing it for yourself. Don't take a good thing and make it bad.

BlueAngel

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Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

[apdiddy]

exactly blue, it opened up doors. acid aswell opened doors of perception for me, but in a very clouded fuzzy way, a lot of time incomprehensible after the trip was over. as far a e goes, it opens up doors which you can understand and go through even after you're done rolling. and it always leads you in a positive direction. the biggest thing i got from e was the perception that you only live once, make the best of it.

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deez nuts

[newsense]

blah blah blah ... U know what E has done for me ... it made sex a whole lot better ... thats about it ... no more, no less

[lordgalactus]

E is a drug, plain and simple. Just like any other drugs, they make you feel amazing. Moderation and knowledge is the key. If you do any drug, you should always have a time where you don't do anything, preferably for a few months. Let your body heal itself. The body is an amazing thing. Never let the high get the best of you, or you'll wind up a statistic. There are always risks, just like anything else in life. BE CAREFUL. DON'T DO GHB! Stay away from that poison! The dosages between a good high and the LAST high are very small. Then again, it's your body. Life is a funny thing. I say, enjoy yourself. If everybody could learn to have fun without drugs, it would be for the best.....I just think everybody should have sex every waking moment....but that's just me!

[blueangel]

pooH, exactly! That's what it made me realize too! I was so focused and concentrated on superfiscial things . .. things that really has no meaning at all. But now . . . it's a whole new story.

newsense, what ever floats your boat.

BlueAngel

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Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

[apdiddy]

what people need to understand also is that threre's a difference between going to a club every weekend, droppin 2-8 hits, and then killin 2 jars of k or a few swigs of g with it. obviously thats a drug abuse problem, and is very unlikely that its enlightening you in any way. the point i was making was that e alone, lemme rephrase, mdma has some great abilities to heal and enlighten people's minds, given you have the ability to construe that. yardapes gettin mangled everyweekend are obviously not doing the drugs so they can get to know themselves better, or have better consicous awarness of the world around them. they're prolly doing it for the very opposite reason, to escape from it all. it all depends on perspective, but i believe mdma, along with pot, have had a profound impact in my life, and no my life wasn't worthless and empty before i ran into these substances, nor is is bliss now. i'm just a lot more intuned to the world and have a better grasp of whats important and whats bullshit in life.

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deez nuts

[frankie_pep]

I rarely do it anymore but it hasn't changed my life much at all ...

It has changed the way music sounds though, thats for sure ...

[back2basics]

CrystalMeth, sound like you have done as many as me, I can relate to some of the things you wrote.

Blue & PooH , I can also relate to what you have experienced. Some research has shown changes in the areas of the brain that are used when performing certain tasks. The research has shown that there is a shift to the more social area of the brain (the front) which women use more than men. This research prompted headlines of "does E feminize the brain?"..

but I do think that I take other people's opinions into account more. I am definitely less superficial or pretensions which does seem to backup the social brain evidence.

[libyagirl]

i guess i should have made a distinction between the type of users when i asked the questions. then it would give a relative space to understand where people's thoughts are coming from.

for example:

virgin user = never used e before

moderate user = 1 - 3 times per month

party user = 4 - 12 per month

all out explosive user = 12+ per month

i'm very unclear on how people use it. so this may not be the best way to separate users.

on average i drop 1 pill once a month. so i'm a guess i would be labeled a moderate user.

[spikesnj]

E TURNED ME INTO A CRACKHEAD..I DONT DO IT ANYMORE...IT FEELS GREAT.

-dave

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WORD..

[apdiddy]

and anyone who compares mdma to coke, heron, speed, k, g acid etc are the same ignorant people who down a fifth of jack and smoke 2 packs of cigs a day cuz 'thems not drugs, the gubment says theys ok.' educate yourself.

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deez nuts

[ibelong2thenight]

before i comment, id like to say that this post has been the most openly and intelligently debated post ive seen up here in awhile. you have managed to really impress me with your responses and "e-analysis." im very new to the clubbing/e scene and started about 6 months ago. ive dropped roughly 20 hits in a four month period. two weeks ago i experienced the worst post e-depression (couple of xmen) and have decided to go clean for awhile. like frixfrax i can relate to almost all of your arguments... but e, just as every other life experience, has a different value to each individual. what is most important is that you realize the effects it has on you and raionalize their worth considering the long term risks. as for me... i know im taking an e-break for now ... who knows where ill be in the long run.

[This message has been edited by ibelong2thenight (edited 08-16-2000).]

[lordgalactus]

MDMA is not in the same category as any other mind altering drug, that affects the brain directly?

[blueangel]

LMAO!!! pooH, you're so funny . . . sometimes.

BlueAngel

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Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.