<<You gotta love the "Jersey Guido" trend>>

[JonStephen]

It might change your life too......

WHERE I BELONG

Being the only Italian who lives in Lower Alabama is not easy. In high school I was more interested in going to the gym and tanning, while everyone else wanted to listen to their country music and drive around on John Deere tractors. I was called “greasyâ€, made fun of all the time for the music I liked, and isolated because of the clothes that I wore. Of course it didn’t take long to figure out that all the ball busting was out of jealousy. I had the best body, best hair, best car, and best girls all through high school. I guess you could call me the blackest sheep (or should I say the tannest sheep) in Alabama.

After high school I went to junior college in Alabama for 3 years, but then I transferred. I went to a college in the Midwest. I had to get away from the South. And for the first time in my life I made friends with guys from Jersey. They were just like me, except introduced me to better guido music and clothes. They taught me that guido wasn’t a dirty word that Alabama kids used to make fun of me, but it was a sign of pride. They took me to get my first tat (a tribal) and my second tat (an Italian flag, to show my pride.) And best of all was the music. I always liked to dance, but the music that they had revolutionized me. The DJ that changed me forever was Louie DeVito. And my boys said, “If you love him, wait tell you hear Denny Tsettos.†This meant nothing to me then, but it would soon.

Unfortunately, after school, I returned to Alabama. I talked on the phone with my boys from Jersey and heard about their crazy stories from the shore and decided I needed to see what all the hype was about. So on July 3, 2002; my friend Tony arrived at Newark Airport to pick me up. He opened the door, and Shiny Disco Balls was blaring from his system. It hit me like a ton of bricks, I knew I loved the song, I loved this state, and I would love the life. I was in for one hell of a weekend. We drove straight to Seaside. I don’t think I closed my mouth for the entire drive up and down the strip. The girls were amazing. They had the tightest bodies! Even the guys blew my mind…it looked like an ad for muscle and fitness. For the first time I saw people that could compete with my body and even a couple that were in better shape than me. (But only a couple)

Surf Club, Djai’s, Tempts. My head was spinning. I walked into Tempts for the first time, ripped off my shirt, and hit the dance floor. I instantly had some of the hottest girl I had ever seen hitting on me. You probably saw me that night. I was the guido with the biggest smile from ear to ear for the entire night. At Surf Club during the day, I stunned all the girls with my body. They were all surprised though to learn that I wasn’t from New Jersey. They were even more shocked to hear that I was from Alabama. I quickly learned to fit in around Seaside. I thought it would take a long time to be comfortable, but I felt at ease immediately. The Jersey Shore was the party that I had been searching for all my life. It’s hard to fully express in words exactly how I felt, but let’s just say it felt like home. I was meant to live in New Jersey. I was meant to dance at Tempts. I was meant to flex on the Seaside boardwalk. I was meant to get the hottest girls in the nation…the girls on the shore. I was meant to be an NJGuido.

As soon as I got home, I had an e-mail from one of my bros , Marco. He entitled it “A little piece of home.†It was a link to NJguido.com. Naturally, this website has inspired me. It does makes me sad each time I log on, because I can’t be at the shore that weekend. But Moo’s motto has brought a ray of hope to my life. “DON’T MISS A WEEKEND. THERE ARE NO EXCUSES!†That is how I live. Since I can’t go to Seaside or Belmar, I drive to other places. Panama City, Tallahassee, Atlanta….and I never miss a weekend. And I have been having the best weekends I ever had in the South. My trip to New Jersey has actually made my life better even away from the Shore. Of course nothing can compare to the promised land. Look for me Labor Day….I’ll be there. When you get to Tempts, look on the dance floor. First, find all the guys with the best bodies. Then pick the one with the biggest smile….that will be me. Thank you New Jersey. Thank you Denny Tsettos. Thank you NJGuido,com. And most of all thank you ladies….don’t worry I’ll be back.

-Chris Marvinello

Enterprise, AL

_________________________________

BWAAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

oh lawdy..... www.njguido.com is the best site ever

[bustaknut2001]

I wouldn't be surprised if it becomes the in thing to be a guido. Wouldn't be surprised at all.

[bsb2002]

i prefer this one, if only because it includes the line "get in the aerostar!" i swear, with all these misplaced guidos, its like the fucking diaspora.

Dear Brother Guidos,

Your web site provides for me vicarious thrills and,

at times, quiet reflection. You see, I am the only

Italian in the yuppiest town on earth--Lake Forest,

IL. I've lived here all my life, but I've always felt

like an outsider. Soccer moms with Golden Retrievers

whiz by in their Volvos and represent a world I

despise. Alas, I am a misplaced guido.

In high school I was totally different. Instead of

polo shirts and khakis I wore tight tanks with

arbitrary numbers on the front and spent my time, not

at the country club, but in the gym getting hard. By

sophomore year, I was by far the biggest and brownest

guy in school. I also invented a walk I called the

"yip yap" that consisted of a delayed leg drag

countered with a sort of wave action with my two arms

working in unison. It's fly. I still use it today.

I got picked on a lot even though I was by far the

best athlete in school. I didn't play any sports, but

I'd jump over garbage cans and stuff to impress girls.

Speaking of girls, I got all of them. By the bushels.

In a world of white, weak preps I was a huge break

from the ordinary. Sort of like Zima. I actually

took pride in getting called names like "Greaser" and

"Greasy" and other forms of lubricants. No one ever

had the balls to say it to my face because my two

arms, Thunder and Lightening, did all the talking for

me.

I didn't go to college in favor of a career in cutlery

sales. I'm bigger than ever but have always felt like

a ship without a port here. My music, my body, my car

are all lost on these people.

Then...a trade show brought me to Jersey for the first

time in my life last summer. Sure, a cutlery trade

show in Tom's River sounds great on the surface, but I

had no idea the adventures and the experiences that

were going to unfold. After four long work days and

being relegated to lifting sessions in a shit ass

hotel gym (ever tried to get a pump with 25s?!),

Saturday, my night of deliverance, finally arrived. I

was in line at GNC when three of the biggest guys

(next to me) I've ever seen wouldn't stop raving about

this place a few miles away called Temptations or

Tempts. I thought they were talking about the Motown

group at first, but when I listened more closely I

heard the buzz words that make my heart beat quicker:

chiseled, thumpin', dancing, jiggin', movin', shakin',

bakin'. I knew I had to check it out.

I asked the guys what all the noise was about. They

complimented me on my physique and I returned the

pleasantries. This one guy Zeek just said, "Get in

the Aerostar. You're comin' with us." Somewhere

along the drive I just started to feel something. It

was like the Tempts energy was reaching out to me in

the back of that Minivan. Through my seatbelt and

everything. We pulled up. I looked and saw a line of

the best looking people I've ever seen im my life. I

got out, jumped around and slapped the backs of the

guys who had delivered me to heaven. I did forty

push-ups to get a good pump and got in line.

A few hours later, I walked into the club. The

people. The energy. The bodies. The music. I took

it slow, but within a few minutes my shirt was off and

I was thumpin' to the beats with everyone. I tried to

take my pants off but I guess that's not cool.

Anyway, I had the best night of my life that night.

To this day, if you see me with a huge smile on my

face, I'm either lifting or I'm thinking about Tempts.

I haven't been back since, but your site helps me feel

as if I'm there. I'm in a new line of work now, and if

Tom's River ever throws a cell phone convention.

I'll be back.

Keep up the great work. There are no excuses.

Antonio DiBella

Lake Forest, Ill.

[tunnelbandit]

I think I'm going to become a guido.

I've been in high debate about this matter for a while now.After reading this my mind is made up. Watch out Temps!!!! Here I come.

[nycchic24]

Originally posted by djjonstephen

It might change your life too......

WHERE I BELONG

Being the only Italian who lives in Lower Alabama is not easy. In high school I was more interested in going to the gym and tanning, while everyone else wanted to listen to their country music and drive around on John Deere tractors. I was called “greasy”, made fun of all the time for the music I liked, and isolated because of the clothes that I wore. Of course it didn’t take long to figure out that all the ball busting was out of jealousy. I had the best body, best hair, best car, and best girls all through high school. I guess you could call me the blackest sheep (or should I say the tannest sheep) in Alabama.

After high school I went to junior college in Alabama for 3 years, but then I transferred. I went to a college in the Midwest. I had to get away from the South. And for the first time in my life I made friends with guys from Jersey. They were just like me, except introduced me to better guido music and clothes. They taught me that guido wasn’t a dirty word that Alabama kids used to make fun of me, but it was a sign of pride. They took me to get my first tat (a tribal) and my second tat (an Italian flag, to show my pride.) And best of all was the music. I always liked to dance, but the music that they had revolutionized me. The DJ that changed me forever was Louie DeVito. And my boys said, “If you love him, wait tell you hear Denny Tsettos.” This meant nothing to me then, but it would soon.

Unfortunately, after school, I returned to Alabama. I talked on the phone with my boys from Jersey and heard about their crazy stories from the shore and decided I needed to see what all the hype was about. So on July 3, 2002; my friend Tony arrived at Newark Airport to pick me up. He opened the door, and Shiny Disco Balls was blaring from his system. It hit me like a ton of bricks, I knew I loved the song, I loved this state, and I would love the life. I was in for one hell of a weekend. We drove straight to Seaside. I don’t think I closed my mouth for the entire drive up and down the strip. The girls were amazing. They had the tightest bodies! Even the guys blew my mind…it looked like an ad for muscle and fitness. For the first time I saw people that could compete with my body and even a couple that were in better shape than me. (But only a couple)

Surf Club, Djai’s, Tempts. My head was spinning. I walked into Tempts for the first time, ripped off my shirt, and hit the dance floor. I instantly had some of the hottest girl I had ever seen hitting on me. You probably saw me that night. I was the guido with the biggest smile from ear to ear for the entire night. At Surf Club during the day, I stunned all the girls with my body. They were all surprised though to learn that I wasn’t from New Jersey. They were even more shocked to hear that I was from Alabama. I quickly learned to fit in around Seaside. I thought it would take a long time to be comfortable, but I felt at ease immediately. The Jersey Shore was the party that I had been searching for all my life. It’s hard to fully express in words exactly how I felt, but let’s just say it felt like home. I was meant to live in New Jersey. I was meant to dance at Tempts. I was meant to flex on the Seaside boardwalk. I was meant to get the hottest girls in the nation…the girls on the shore. I was meant to be an NJGuido.

As soon as I got home, I had an e-mail from one of my bros , Marco. He entitled it “A little piece of home.” It was a link to NJguido.com. Naturally, this website has inspired me. It does makes me sad each time I log on, because I can’t be at the shore that weekend. But Moo’s motto has brought a ray of hope to my life. “DON’T MISS A WEEKEND. THERE ARE NO EXCUSES!” That is how I live. Since I can’t go to Seaside or Belmar, I drive to other places. Panama City, Tallahassee, Atlanta….and I never miss a weekend. And I have been having the best weekends I ever had in the South. My trip to New Jersey has actually made my life better even away from the Shore. Of course nothing can compare to the promised land. Look for me Labor Day….I’ll be there. When you get to Tempts, look on the dance floor. First, find all the guys with the best bodies. Then pick the one with the biggest smile….that will be me. Thank you New Jersey. Thank you Denny Tsettos. Thank you NJGuido,com. And most of all thank you ladies….don’t worry I’ll be back.

-Chris Marvinello

Enterprise, AL

_________________________________

BWAAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

oh lawdy..... www.njguido.com is the best site ever

i am not sending you links anymore. lol jk actually i was when i read that.

but actually the best website is still www.roxyguy.netfirms.com

[JonStephen]

This is it...this is definately it

This was taken from that roxyguy website nucchick suggested, but it is so true.

You wanna learn to dance like a guido? Here you go.....

___________________________________________________

Now that you've mastered the moves, drinking, and flexing, you'll need to learn the dances

of the Roxy Guy. We'll start with the basic moves, then progress.

A reminder for these moves. During all dances:

1. Puck your lips forward and give an affirmative, yet arrogant, pucker.

2. Keep your arm muscles flexed. A Roxy Guy needs to show off his physique at ALL times.

3. Stare at every woman as you dance.

4. Never wipe the sweat from your face.

Dance 1: Bobbing

The easiest move. Bob back and forth. Make sure you do it in conjuction with the music, keep

your lips pucked with the arrogant yet affirmative look, and muscles flexed.

Dance 2: Side to Side

A very simple motion. Do the bobbing, but now move to the left then to the right,

back to the left, then to the right, etc. Get it?

Dance 3: Tricep Pulldown or Pogo Stick

As a Roxy Guy you need to show off your muscles. This dance allows you to do it.

Like the Tricep Pulldown weight move, you pretend you are holding a bar parallel

to your body, with your hands close together, both clenched in fists. Now keep

your hands about 5 inches apart. Now go up and down like the Tricep Pulldown.

Do it fast and flex your triceps. Now look to the left, middle, right, then middle,

left, middle, right, etc. Now do the Side To Side. This is a GREAT dance move,

one of my favorites.

Dance 4: Face Pulldown

Pretend you have a mask on. To remove it grab the top portion where your forehead is and

pull straight down. Like this motion, you do the same for the face pulldown. But in this

dance move you do one hand at a time. So, right hand pulldown, then left hand pulldown.

Proceed doing this back and forth with both hands. Don't forget to flex..

Dance 5: Nordic Track

This is the ultimate Roxy Guy dance move. When you've learned this dance, you are the top.

This is pretty much a summation of the above. You've all seen the Nordic Track

commercials, right? Remember the cross country ski machine? Well the motions are

similar.

Here's what you do. Like the Face PullDown, instead of pulling from your face, pull from

further away from your face and pull from the opposite side of your arms. So if you are

pulling with your right, outstretch your arm to the LEFT and pull down and inward from the

left side. For the left arm, pull down from the right. Practice this first so you get the hang

of it.

Once that's mastered you need the footwork. When you outstretch your right arm, kick out

your left leg. As you pull in, bring in your left leg. Now do the same for your left arm and right

leg. This is a toughie so keep trying till you get it in a superfluous motion. Wow, the chicks

will love you if you can do this dance move.

The last advice I can give is mix up all these moves and start making your own routine. For

example I like the Tri Pulldown, with side to side, and throwing in some full body circle spins.

You will have reached Roxy Guy to the fullest.

[joeg]

:laugh:

[bsb2002]

Originally posted by djjonstephen

This is a toughie so keep trying till you get it in a superfluous motion.

Uh, I'm no english major, but this can't be right.

[acura]

BWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA this is great

[jaysea]

is it me, or is half this fucking city xtra pissy today? this bitch on the train today gave me the nastiest look, and since than iv been like in such a BAD MOOD.......

anyone wanna get drunk? lunch n Drunk?

lol

[wahoo]

oh shit thats funny..

also don't forget to wear black spandex banana republic pants, xtra booty tight; white spandex calvin klein wife beaters, extra shiny; the latest gel from some exotic style lab in joizey that gets your hair standing up likes it on viagra; and sing at the top of your voice jimmy buffet's margaritaville altered to "Take me to Guidoville" as your going out anthem when heading to nyc clubs (i.e roxy, webster hall, exit)...

[highmay]

Originally posted by jaysea

is it me, or is half this fucking city xtra pissy today? this bitch on the train today gave me the nastiest look, and since than iv been like in such a BAD MOOD.......

anyone wanna get drunk? lunch n Drunk?

lol

that scares me that people who play no significant role in your life can get you THAT pissed off...

people: let's all make sure we put our energy towards keeping this man away from any murderous object at all times....

[rocketfuel76]

I can't get the vision of big guidos in an Aerostar on their way to TEMPTS!!!

"Hey get in the Taurus Wagon"!

:laugh:

[LavenderMenace]

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA

awesome.

[nycmuzik]

Thats classic..... :laugh2:

[daemoncel]

what is that songs that plays on the main page?

[sdeelite]

I just discovered the njguido website myself...

Seriously disturbing:eek:

U'd think these guys were kidding writing all that, but they're REALLY not.

"Dance 2: Side to Side

A very simple motion. Do the bobbing, but now move to the left then to the right,

back to the left, then to the right, etc. Get it?

Dance 3: Tricep Pulldown or Pogo Stick

As a Roxy Guy you need to show off your muscles. This dance allows you to do it.

Like the Tricep Pulldown weight move, you pretend you are holding a bar parallel

to your body, with your hands close together, both clenched in fists. Now keep

your hands about 5 inches apart. Now go up and down like the Tricep Pulldown.

Do it fast and flex your triceps. Now look to the left, middle, right, then middle,

left, middle, right, etc. Now do the Side To Side. This is a GREAT dance move,

one of my favorites. "

Now that is some seriously complicated shit. .

If anyone is bored and wants to really ROFL I suggest visiting the site. One visit, and you'll wonder what this world has come to.

[dr0ne]

Originally posted by bustaknut2001

I wouldn't be surprised if it becomes the in thing to be a guido. Wouldn't be surprised at all.

what do you mean "becomes"

[brickhouse]

It's been the "in" thing to be guido in Central and Northern Florida for a loooong time now. It's amusing when the people at the 'swanky' clubs are dressed like guidos....

[randall16]

thats hysterical....they talked about the Nordic track,,,,,

[dgmodel]

[cintron]

It's absolutely terrifying.

The fashion, the music, the loads and loads of topless flexing pics, pics of asses and pics with JP...

i mean i know it's wrong to stereotype but what do you do when someone just WALKS right into it?!

[wahoo]

Have y'all read the "writings" page: HOLY SHIT I am dying of laughter

[nycchic24]

Originally posted by cintron

It's absolutely terrifying.

The fashion, the music, the loads and loads of topless flexing pics, pics of asses and pics with JP...

i mean i know it's wrong to stereotype but what do you do when someone just WALKS right into it?!

i think both websites are great... imo at least both ppl that created each website have a sense of humor bc if you can't laugh at yourself, then what or who can you laugh at???

and "terrifying" i think thats a lil extreme? i can think of alot more differnt groups that are more terrifying than the guido subculture

but to each their own, right

[sweetie029]

OMG!! That website is HORRIBLE and Jersey along with every "guido" in it should be blown up!!! These idiots are a disgrace to the Italian heritage & it really makes me ashamed of being Italian lol