LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 So my new boyfriend, that i havent yet had sex with ( we have been seen eachother for about a month or so) said he got a vasectomy last year.. but hes young (under 25)... Im not sure I believe him, I dont know if a dr would do it at such a young age...It dont bother me if he has really had it done, because I like him alot and i dont want children ever either...and he really dont want kids himself.. Do I believe him? He said if i dont believe him he will show me proof of the operation if i'd like. We are still gonna have protected sex untill we are together for quite a while, and Im not really worried about it because we are taking everything slow, and we are not sure about how long we want to wait before we have sex... but he said eventually he hopes we can trust eachother enough to have unprotected sex, and we have nothing to worry about.. should i trust him, should i ask for proof? is there any way i can tell on my own? would a dr even do it at such a young age?someone helppppppppp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonStephen Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 I thought you were into chicks??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullseye Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 im not 100% sure, but i would assume you can do it any age. as far as scars, i think they make an incision in the nut sack, so you may wanna look for scars next time your down there. sounds kinda weird that he would have done this procedure already at his age, but what do i know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizlissa Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Why not ask for proof? It's common for a couple to be tested for stds before they engage in a sexual relationship for the first time with each other.. it really should be a standard. This would be just another type of safety measure, for you. Maybe you could just get it all done in one appt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by djjonstephen I thought you were into chicks??? girls are pretty...I only date guys though.. lolthanks people for the help...I guess I'll just ask for proof... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonStephen Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz girls are pretty...I only date guys though.. lolthanks people for the help...I guess I'll just ask for proof... this might be a lil off topic, but since you think girls are pretty....is that a turn on for you (good looking girls I mean)**this was the topic of conversation at Viscaya Saturday night with some friends so this isnt completely out of the blue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by djjonstephen this might be a lil off topic, but since you think girls are pretty....is that a turn on for you (good looking girls I mean)**this was the topic of conversation at Viscaya Saturday night with some friends so this isnt completely out of the blue yes girls turn me on totally, im turned on by both sexes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonStephen Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz yes girls turn me on totally, im turned on by both sexes yet....you wont date girlshere's the kicker.......why not?...........societal provisons? personal preferance? family acceptance?this is soooo the whole convo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by djjonstephen yet....you wont date girlshere's the kicker.......why not?...........societal provisons? personal preferance? family acceptance?this is soooo the whole convo why not? girls turn me on sexually , not emotionally. I cant picture myself falling "in-love" with a female. Dont get me wrong , I have plenty of female friends I love, but not on that emotional connected level, its just a friendship level. Besides I dont get that security and safe feeling around females that I do around males. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barvybe Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 I actually think that's pretty normal - i've had a couple very good female friends for years who also only dates guys but are bi-sexual. When they don't have bf's they have socially dated girls but never gotten into "relationships" with them. I think its mostly sexual for them and they don't particularly want the lifestyle changes associated with say living with a gf. Also you know they say every bf / gf could be your last and i think there's a mental barrier about giving up raising a family even if consciously you don't think you'll ever want kids...ABout the penile snipping - i worked with a dude who was catholic and married and his wife wouldn't use contraception. I think they had sex about 6 times during the six years i knew him and ended up with five kids under the age of six lol. He was 27 when he got snipped.One thing is its not 100% this operation - just like a girl who gets the tubes tied there's a very small chance you can still get pregnant...i mean its not like you can look at him and tell that the doc did a good job or not. But he should have a scar for sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notallthere444 Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz So my new boyfriend, that i havent yet had sex with ( we have been seen eachother for about a month or so) said he got a vasectomy last year.. but hes young (under 25)... Im not sure I believe him, I dont know if a dr would do it at such a young age...It dont bother me if he has really had it done, because I like him alot and i dont want children ever either...and he really dont want kids himself.. Do I believe him? He said if i dont believe him he will show me proof of the operation if i'd like. We are still gonna have protected sex untill we are together for quite a while, and Im not really worried about it because we are taking everything slow, and we are not sure about how long we want to wait before we have sex... but he said eventually he hopes we can trust eachother enough to have unprotected sex, and we have nothing to worry about.. should i trust him, should i ask for proof? is there any way i can tell on my own? would a dr even do it at such a young age?someone helppppppppp never want kids? why? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by barvybe ABout the penile snipping - i worked with a dude who was catholic and married and his wife wouldn't use contraception. I think they had sex about 6 times during the six years i knew him and ended up with five kids under the age of six lol. He was 27 when he got snipped. yeah but remember.. he dont have any kids.. and hes not even 25yet.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barvybe Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 well personally i think its weird to do anything that permenantly impairs how your body functions..especially when you are so young because i don't think there are any absolutes - he might regret it later.but i don't think its odd that the doc would do the procedure - i'm sure they asked him lots of questions, made him talk to someone, sign stuff...i mean ultimately if you are willing to pay for it there's no legal reason why a doc wouldn't do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by notallthere444 never want kids? why? im very selfish, i like the fact i have niece n nephiew that i can play with, have sleep over, take out, and still give them back when im done with them...I was in the delivery room while my sister gave birth, and this did scar me a bit, allthough it might sound stupid...enough people are having kids that i dont need to reproduce. And if i ever change my mind, there are alot of children who are not babies (usually couples who can not reproduce want babys)who never asked to be born, who just want someone to love them, that need loving homes.. i know everyone says im young and that i'll change my mind.. but i dont think i will... im just not intreasted in children, and dont have full time patience for them, therefor i dont want them... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barvybe Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 well that's very good spirited of you...like i said above though i think that things can change. You never know what will happen if you meet the "right" guy who also wants to have kids and your feelings might change - maternal instinct take over.that's why i think that have the medical procedures done is unfortunate cause you could have regrets later on...at the very least if i were this guy i would have put some of my boyz on ice... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by barvybe well that's very good spirited of you...like i said above though i think that things can change. You never know what will happen if you meet the "right" guy who also wants to have kids and your feelings might change - maternal instinct take over.that's why i think that have the medical procedures done is unfortunate cause you could have regrets later on...at the very least if i were this guy i would have put some of my boyz on ice... actually, in my opinion, he wouldnt be the 'right guy' unless he didnt want kids either.. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notallthere444 Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz im very selfish, i like the fact i have niece n nephiew that i can play with, have sleep over, take out, and still give them back when im done with them...I was in the delivery room while my sister gave birth, and this did scar me a bit, allthough it might sound stupid...enough people are having kids that i dont need to reproduce. And if i ever change my mind, there are alot of children who are not babies (usually couples who can not reproduce want babys)who never asked to be born, who just want someone to love them, that need loving homes.. i know everyone says im young and that i'll change my mind.. but i dont think i will... im just not intreasted in children, and dont have full time patience for them, therefor i dont want them... I hear everything your saying except i think i would want kids,. Sometimes i think like it is the next step in life and helps you feel that you have worth as you get older, Helps you forget that your coming closer to dying everyday you are living.. so i guess i have selfish reasons as well .. .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somebitch Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 no dr in their right mind would allow a 25 year old guy with no children to get a vasectomy. men are capable of having kids until late in life, why would someone want to give up that opportunity at 25?? i dont get it. i dont want kids either but i would never consider getting my tubes tied. what if this guy falls in love and his gf really wants children? he would say SORRY, i got a vasectomy at 24?? i think it is hard to reverse a vasectomy too. i think usually they dont allow peole without kids to get it done & they dont just let young people (maybe if they have some terrible condiition in their genetics). if youre 24 you are not capable of knowing what you will want at 26, 30, 33, 40.. 25 is too young to know for sure what you want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by somebitch no dr in their right mind would allow a 25 year old guy with no children to get a vasectomy. men are capable of having kids until late in life, why would someone want to give up that opportunity at 25?? i dont get it. i dont want kids either but i would never consider getting my tubes tied. what if this guy falls in love and his gf really wants children? he would say SORRY, i got a vasectomy at 24?? i think it is hard to reverse a vasectomy too. i think usually they dont allow peole without kids to get it done & they dont just let young people (maybe if they have some terrible condiition in their genetics). if youre 24 you are not capable of knowing what you will want at 26, 30, 33, 40.. 25 is too young to know for sure what you want. this is what i said.. but he says he has proof that he will show me...im thinking maybe he had a health reason that he got this done, that maybe hes not comfortable talking about just yet.. I totally understand.. Either way so far i think hes a great guy... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notallthere444 Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz this is what i said.. but he says he has proof that he will show me...im thinking maybe he had a health reason that he got this done, that maybe hes not comfortable talking about just yet.. I totally understand.. Either way so far i think hes a great guy... Doesent want to spread the aids around? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by notallthere444 Doesent want to spread the aids around? well I dont think having a Vasectomy would stop the spread of aids.. thats like saying a Historectmy would stop the spread of genetal warts....Maybe he had a testecular problem, and had to have something removed or operated on, and now cant have kids, but just tells me he had a vasectomy..He said he usually dont like to tell girls about it because they get turned off and most girls want children. But im understanding, and he trusts me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barvybe Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz actually, in my opinion, he wouldnt be the 'right guy' unless he didnt want kids either.. lol i get that...i'm just saying that you never know and there's a chance (however small) that you might change your mind on that at some point. Same thinking as to why a guy shouldn't get snipped so you cause he might have regrets...that's all i'm saying.i've had a couple friends who swore they'd never want kids. Ever..with anyone. Then BAM they got married and suddenly changed their minds...shrug. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LikmyLipz Posted January 6 Author Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by barvybe i get that...i'm just saying that you never know and there's a chance (however small) that you might change your mind on that at some point. Same thinking as to why a guy shouldn't get snipped so you cause he might have regrets...that's all i'm saying.i've had a couple friends who swore they'd never want kids. Ever..with anyone. Then BAM they got married and suddenly changed their minds...shrug. I understand allthough like i said, i'd rather adopt a child... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barvybe Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 if i were to adopt i think i'd want an older kid too...even though its cool to be able to bond with the baby and stuff i'm seriously afraid that you could end up with a kid with serious problems that aren't so obvious at the baby stage. Its one thing when its YOUR kid that has physical / mental problems and people who adopt kids like that are saints...but if i adopt i don't want to take that on. If you adopt a kid that's like 3 - 7 years old you can pretty much gauge their personality and stuff which is better i think. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
notallthere444 Posted January 6 Report Share Posted January 6 Originally posted by LikmyLipz well I dont think having a Vasectomy would stop the spread of aids.. thats like saying a Historectmy would stop the spread of genetal warts....Maybe he had a testecular problem, and had to have something removed or operated on, and now cant have kids, but just tells me he had a vasectomy..He said he usually dont like to tell girls about it because they get turned off and most girls want children. But im understanding, and he trusts me. I was only joking but with that honest answer you made me feel bad lol, Anyway def look into it maybe hes saying what you want to hear just to play head games.. Never underestimate peoples lies. . Can I glue doll parts to your face? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.