computerjockey Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 Sorry about the title typo - obviously it's "straight guys" and not "straight gays"...What straight guys need to do if they for whatever reason approach a gay guy to discuss any subject matter:1) Although it's a given you're going to do so when you're coming up to us, try to avoid asserting how straight you are within the first 5 minutes of the conversation. We already know that. There are a few key factors that clue us in - just in the same way you know we're gay, we already know you're straight. Try waiting a moment. If the guy is interested he'll drop a few polite clues. That's when you casually mention something about your girlfriend. Usually the best response is "gee, I'm flattered but I'm straight". The guy will totally respect that and will not go there again.2) If you're coming up to the guy most likely the guy has it going on somewhat and either already has a boyfriend or isn't looking. It's a bit different how gay guys view each other compared to how straight guys look at girls. Again, I can't speak for all gay men, but most of us have a caliber that we stick to. Like I said the guy probably has it going on and he's probably looking for the same so you'll be kidding yourself if you don't seriously ask yourself, even if you were gay, if he'd be at all interested.Don't get me wrong - you have your slutty people, whether it be a guy or a girl, who'll sleep with just about anything. However you gotta think about where you're at when you're going up to someone who's gay. If you're at some event or some 'hip' club most likely you're on this guy's own turf and trust me this isn't the 1st time some straight guy has come up to him to chat about something totally nonsexual. You'll come across a lot better if you find the perfect time to slide in that "I'm straight" thing instead of making it the 2nd or 3rd point you make. Some of my best friendships have been with straight guys and I can tell you not one of them was someone who had to insert his sexuality the first moment he could. - note to the guy last night: I'm not trying to find fault with you, because I don't, it's just a point I need to make. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liquidskyny Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 *ahem* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest gabo Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 being gay is so 2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starscream Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 Sorry about the title typo - obviously it's "straight guys" and not "straight gays"...What straight guys need to do if they for whatever reason approach a gay guy to discuss any subject matter:1) Although it's a given you're going to do so when you're coming up to us, try to avoid asserting how straight you are within the first 5 minutes of the conversation. We already know that. There are a few key factors that clue us in - just in the same way you know we're gay, we already know you're straight. Try waiting a moment. If the guy is interested he'll drop a few polite clues. That's when you casually mention something about your girlfriend. Usually the best response is "gee, I'm flattered but I'm straight". The guy will totally respect that and will not go there again.2) If you're coming up to the guy most likely the guy has it going on somewhat and either already has a boyfriend or isn't looking. It's a bit different how gay guys view each other compared to how straight guys look at girls. Again, I can't speak for all gay men, but most of us have a caliber that we stick to. Like I said the guy probably has it going on and he's probably looking for the same so you'll be kidding yourself if you don't seriously ask yourself, even if you were gay, if he'd be at all interested.Don't get me wrong - you have your slutty people, whether it be a guy or a girl, who'll sleep with just about anything. However you gotta think about where you're at when you're going up to someone who's gay. If you're at some event or some 'hip' club most likely you're on this guy's own turf and trust me this isn't the 1st time some straight guy has come up to him to chat about something totally nonsexual. You'll come across a lot better if you find the perfect time to slide in that "I'm straight" thing instead of making it the 2nd or 3rd point you make. Some of my best friendships have been with straight guys and I can tell you not one of them was someone who had to insert his sexuality the first moment he could. - note to the guy last night: I'm not trying to find fault with you, because I don't, it's just a point I need to make.Yeah ok CJ whatever you say.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maxpetersky Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 That's supposed to be a "QUICK" note? That was way too much information to absorb without alcohol!ComputerJockey, the problem with people in general (not just gay guys) is that they can't change the way they feel. I've witnessed gay guys falling in love with straight guys: as a result they always got their feelings hurt. So isn't it better to explicitly state right away that I am straight, so that gay guys manage their expectations?As cynical as this sounds, I strongly suspect that you just weren't attracted to straight guys that you've been friends with. I have a few female friends, but none of them I consider attractive, and I've never been able to be friends with pretty girls without turning it into a sexual relationationship. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
growinupjersey Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 i think when your a straight guy and your talking to a gay guy the conversation is different. Yes your talking to another guy but you also have to have the convo relate to them as well. So instead of talking about football and how many touchdowns Tiki Barber scored this past week. You instead might talk about how good his ass looks in his uniform or wonder how much fun it would be to play center. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crowina Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 i never knew they were rule on how to talk to someone... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desp4sex Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 *ahem* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drillz2go Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 that was a pretty gay epiphany you had there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbiewoodside Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 So you are saying you should let the guy know you are straight BEFORE you let him go down on you in the bathroom?Who knew? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
someclown Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 i think when your a straight guy and your talking to a gay guy the conversation is different. Yes your talking to another guy but you also have to have the convo relate to them as well. So instead of talking about football and how many touchdowns Tiki Barber scored this past week. You instead might talk about how good his ass looks in his uniform or wonder how much fun it would be to play center. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
it290 Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 if we don't want them to over-generalize us we shouldn't over-generalize them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris817 Posted April 4 Report Share Posted April 4 Maybe straight guys would not have to say it in the first couple of sentences if some gay guys would take NO for an answer.. Its a lot of gay guys fantasies to be with a straight guy... They figure well he is in a gay club so he might like it...Most get it but a lot dont.. I have been to many a gay party and people just dont get it.. even be told i should not be there b/c i am straight.. Sorry about the title typo - obviously it's "straight guys" and not "straight gays"...What straight guys need to do if they for whatever reason approach a gay guy to discuss any subject matter:1) Although it's a given you're going to do so when you're coming up to us, try to avoid asserting how straight you are within the first 5 minutes of the conversation. We already know that. There are a few key factors that clue us in - just in the same way you know we're gay, we already know you're straight. Try waiting a moment. If the guy is interested he'll drop a few polite clues. That's when you casually mention something about your girlfriend. Usually the best response is "gee, I'm flattered but I'm straight". The guy will totally respect that and will not go there again.2) If you're coming up to the guy most likely the guy has it going on somewhat and either already has a boyfriend or isn't looking. It's a bit different how gay guys view each other compared to how straight guys look at girls. Again, I can't speak for all gay men, but most of us have a caliber that we stick to. Like I said the guy probably has it going on and he's probably looking for the same so you'll be kidding yourself if you don't seriously ask yourself, even if you were gay, if he'd be at all interested.Don't get me wrong - you have your slutty people, whether it be a guy or a girl, who'll sleep with just about anything. However you gotta think about where you're at when you're going up to someone who's gay. If you're at some event or some 'hip' club most likely you're on this guy's own turf and trust me this isn't the 1st time some straight guy has come up to him to chat about something totally nonsexual. You'll come across a lot better if you find the perfect time to slide in that "I'm straight" thing instead of making it the 2nd or 3rd point you make. Some of my best friendships have been with straight guys and I can tell you not one of them was someone who had to insert his sexuality the first moment he could. - note to the guy last night: I'm not trying to find fault with you, because I don't, it's just a point I need to make. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starscream Posted April 5 Report Share Posted April 5 Maybe straight guys would not have to say it in the first couple of sentences if some gay guys would take NO for an answer.. Its a lot of gay guys fantasies to be with a straight guy... They figure well he is in a gay club so he might like it...Most get it but a lot dont.. I have been to many a gay party and people just dont get it.. even be told i should not be there b/c i am straight..i GEt IT BELIEVE ME!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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