weyes Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 i work in retail, and one day last week a guy asked for my number. i didn't really want to give it to him, but i don't know how to say no, and he seemed harmless enough. besides, i figured, maybe he wouldn't call. but he did, and we went out for coffee for an hour or so last night.it was casual i guess, but he was giving me that look - that "i'm really taken with you" look, and i'm just not interested. but he asked me if i was doing anything tonight and i wasn't, so i really couldn't lie... and i said i'd call him after work...so today i was faced with what to say to him to get across that i don't want to see him again. saying "i'm not interested" flat out just seems harsh to me, so i was asking everyone i know how i could put it, and i settled on "i'm not interested in a relationship right now," which is true, to some extent.so i called him, he asked what i wanted to do tonight, and i said that i didn't wanna go out tonight 'cause i'm exhausted (which is true), and that i'm not looking for a relationship right now. he got all huffy and said, "what makes you think i am???" as though he had had no interest, hadn't been calling me, been telling me when to call him, and coming by my work multiple times. he was trying to save face --- or whatever. sooo lame. it just made me feel like he was trying to play me for an idiot. "ok..." i said, "i'm just telling you where i am."then he tells me he just found out today that he has to fly back home to indiana, needs to put his stuff in storage and needs help with that, and that he has no one to help him, and, could i help him with that tomorrow? i told him that i work tomorrow between 10:30 and 6:30, and he tells me that the place closes at 7:30, so, could i do it in the morning? WTF?????????? what do i owe this guy? he has NO friends in this town? what about his roommates? i said i couldn't do it in the morning, but i could try to get off work at 6. all this 'cause i'm a nice person and i've been in jams before. but some frikkin' nerve. how have you guys let people down easy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elementx Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 Originally posted by weyes i work in retail, and one day last week a guy asked for my number. i didn't really want to give it to him, but i don't know how to say no, and he seemed harmless enough. besides, i figured, maybe he wouldn't call. but he did, and we went out for coffee for an hour or so last night.it was casual i guess, but he was giving me that look - that "i'm really taken with you" look, and i'm just not interested. but he asked me if i was doing anything tonight and i wasn't, so i really couldn't lie... and i said i'd call him after work...so today i was faced with what to say to him to get across that i don't want to see him again. saying "i'm not interested" flat out just seems harsh to me, so i was asking everyone i know how i could put it, and i settled on "i'm not interested in a relationship right now," which is true, to some extent.so i called him, he asked what i wanted to do tonight, and i said that i didn't wanna go out tonight 'cause i'm exhausted (which is true), and that i'm not looking for a relationship right now. he got all huffy and said, "what makes you think i am???" as though he had had no interest, hadn't been calling me, been telling me when to call him, and coming by my work multiple times. he was trying to save face --- or whatever. sooo lame. it just made me feel like he was trying to play me for an idiot. "ok..." i said, "i'm just telling you where i am."then he tells me he just found out today that he has to fly back home to indiana, needs to put his stuff in storage and needs help with that, and that he has no one to help him, and, could i help him with that tomorrow? i told him that i work tomorrow between 10:30 and 6:30, and he tells me that the place closes at 7:30, so, could i do it in the morning? WTF?????????? what do i owe this guy? he has NO friends in this town? what about his roommates? i said i couldn't do it in the morning, but i could try to get off work at 6. all this 'cause i'm a nice person and i've been in jams before. but some frikkin' nerve. how have you guys let people down easy? Would have been easier if you lied from minute one when he asked for you number to just tell him that you had a boyfriend... Sorry, Can't offer advice over here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sassa Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 wtf?? i would have to agree with elementx, true, it's very uncomfortable to be put in that position, but either you should lie in the beginning (i have a bf, i'm a lesbian, i've got pms) or just say, thanks but i'm not really keen on doing that. so what.....there are way too many guys in the world to care....besides, think about it this way: if you said ok to every guy that was interested in you, you'd be a major slut hehehe... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orisha Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 If someone acts like that, then you have the liscence to be blunt. It's much esier than being diplomatic, and gets the point across. I would just not return his calls and leave his ass hanging, personally. he sounds like a waste of your time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjkitten Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 You went out with this guy once and he's asking you to help him move his stuff around ? Where does this guy get off ????. Thats like the Seinfeld episode where the baseball player asks Jerry to help him move. That just isn't right.Tell him to be a man and handle his own business Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigsteve8 Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 That's just sad that he's asking for your help to move stuff. . . that he doesnt have any friends or such.But I've seen it from the other side, if I see someone working somewhere that looks interesting, often just go for the number after minimal setup, if i get it go for something simple like coffee or a drink or whateva, then try going from there. . . most of the time out of that, best i get is booty call, don't find anything i'm really interested in dating working in a store, but can often get some. My favorites are people in an independent (non-chain) clothing or shoe store, meaning they;re not making much likely . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captainpec Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 Sounds like something from the movie "Cable Guy." You better do something soon before he invites you to Medieval Times.Tell him straight up that you don't feel comfortable with him asking you to run personal errands when he just met you. End this "acquantenace" now before it turns ugly... some guys don't know how to take a hint - you don't want to be alone with this guy and have him make an advance at you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Felix_Leiter Posted August 31 Report Share Posted August 31 tell him you dont find him attractive and that you dont date ugly people Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anotherway83 Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 you should've just said "i have a boyfriend, sorry"...even if you dont. i doubt he'd pursue the matter any further after that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vicman Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 just tell him he's ugly or something...as a guy, we're pretty much used to be being rejected, turned down, etc. after a minute or two he'll get over it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiii Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 you know what works like a charm...when someone asks for your number...say..."i really can't afford to pay my phone bill...""but if you give me some money i can turn it back on..."sends em runnin for the hills...besides...i hate when people try to pick you up at work...its like your held captive...and how rude can you be to someone at your job... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weyes Posted September 1 Author Report Share Posted September 1 so many good points, you guys !!! thanks .i managed to escape work today without seeing him waiting for me afterwards, so i think i'm free and clear. i think the best idea may just be the ol' "i have a boyfriend" in the beginning. i do remember once telling a really cool and attractive guy that once, though, when it was true, and he thought i was just trying to get rid of him; it made me feel really bad that he didn't believe me . in the end, i think he probably would've been a better guy than the one i was going out with at the time .Originally posted by vicmanjust tell him he's ugly or something...as a guy, we're pretty much used to be being rejected, turned down, etc. after a minute or two he'll get over it.that's really mean . and girls don't turn you down for being ugly . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anotherway83 Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 Originally posted by weyes that's really mean . and girls don't turn you down for being ugly . lol maybe not in all cases, but to say that a guy's looks have nothing to do with it is like saying women aren't human IMHO sumtimes women do turn guys down simply because they're not "up to the mark" so to speak Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiii Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 give em your number...and tell him if your kid answers... he should hang up... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjkitten Posted September 1 Report Share Posted September 1 Originally posted by bodiii give em your number...and tell him if your kid answers... he should hang up... very clever I'm gonna try that one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weyes Posted September 2 Author Report Share Posted September 2 Originally posted by anotherway83 lol maybe not in all cases, but to say that a guy's looks have nothing to do with it is like saying women aren't human IMHO sumtimes women do turn guys down simply because they're not "up to the mark" so to speak i was addressing that comment specifically to vicman . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trancerxn112 Posted September 2 Report Share Posted September 2 make it quick and painless... tell him you started seeing someone. and for gods sake learn to lie... a little white lie once in awhile doesnt hurt anyone, infact is sometimes the preferred route. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hispm Posted September 2 Report Share Posted September 2 Originally posted by weyes i work in retail, and one day last week a guy asked for my number. i didn't really want to give it to him, but i don't know how to say no, and he seemed harmless enough. besides, i figured, maybe he wouldn't call. but he did, and we went out for coffee for an hour or so last night.it was casual i guess, but he was giving me that look - that "i'm really taken with you" look, and i'm just not interested. but he asked me if i was doing anything tonight and i wasn't, so i really couldn't lie... and i said i'd call him after work...so today i was faced with what to say to him to get across that i don't want to see him again. saying "i'm not interested" flat out just seems harsh to me, so i was asking everyone i know how i could put it, and i settled on "i'm not interested in a relationship right now," which is true, to some extent.so i called him, he asked what i wanted to do tonight, and i said that i didn't wanna go out tonight 'cause i'm exhausted (which is true), and that i'm not looking for a relationship right now. he got all huffy and said, "what makes you think i am???" as though he had had no interest, hadn't been calling me, been telling me when to call him, and coming by my work multiple times. he was trying to save face --- or whatever. sooo lame. it just made me feel like he was trying to play me for an idiot. "ok..." i said, "i'm just telling you where i am."then he tells me he just found out today that he has to fly back home to indiana, needs to put his stuff in storage and needs help with that, and that he has no one to help him, and, could i help him with that tomorrow? i told him that i work tomorrow between 10:30 and 6:30, and he tells me that the place closes at 7:30, so, could i do it in the morning? WTF?????????? what do i owe this guy? he has NO friends in this town? what about his roommates? i said i couldn't do it in the morning, but i could try to get off work at 6. all this 'cause i'm a nice person and i've been in jams before. but some frikkin' nerve. how have you guys let people down easy? is it that hard to say "No"...Hey, can I get you number...JK.you should've just told him you had a boyfriend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.