CONFUSED: Advice Needed

[bodiii]

don't tell him...

if you tell him know...

he'll think you can't be trusted...

it will just lead to ridiculous jealousy and such...

live with it...

you fucked up... twice...

should'nt have lied in the first place but you can't go back sooooo...

let it go and move on...

relieving yoursself of the guilt will just fuck things up...

[Kontrol]

fuck tastyt

[xpyrate]

Originally posted by Ladyshady

And well, the inevitable happened one night, we had sex. Well, sort of.

Can someone please explain to me how someone can "sort of" have sex? I really really need help with this. C'mon. pfft.

[housedog]

I will try. Pot heads giving advice. Ok it was good you told him about the kissing and shit that you did. I say that kissing is not really cheating. But I do agree it is wrong and if you really like this guy you should not have done it. Whatever, whats done is done, it was good you told him and he took it lightly. Some people would break up with you over it. He seems like an understanding guy. Now with the shit you didnt tell him, I wouldn't. If you tell him now he is going to think what else didnt this bitch tell me. Then I think he will break up with you. Keep it to yourself if down the road say like two years if you are still together then you might be thing about telling him. There is always that chance that he knows that you kissed someone and he might think it os OK for him to do it. Some guys are like that. Keep your eyes open for that.

Good Luck in your relationship

Originally posted by ladyshady

Okay. I'm gunna make this as short as I can.

I've been with my boyfriend for about 7 months. Now, I went away over the summer with a bunch of my girls. And at this time I wasn't really sure if I loved him or not, or how much I loved him, or how long this was gunna last. But I went on vacation with him in mind, and didn't want to cheat, and I'm not a cheating person at all. Well, that didn't happen and I wound up talking to a few guys. I mean, I made out with a few guys(and by a few I mean like 3, not 23 lol) during some really drunken nights at a club. (A little kissing doesn't hurt now does it?) And one time it ended up being a little more than innocent making out and this guy went down on me(no, not in the club lol) So me and that guy started haning. And well, the inevitable happened one night, we had sex. Well, sort of. We started to, but then I said I'm sorry I really can't do this I have a boyfriend. He was a cool guy and he understood, so we stopped.

Now when i came home, I told my boyfriend SOME of what happened. (i.e. making out with a few guys and the oral sex thing) He was a little upset but glad I told him right away and didn't lie to him.

Since then I have NEVER done ANYTHING with another guy. The thought has never crossed my mind. I really love this guy.

Now, months later, we've been together and things have been great. And I know he's never cheated on me and I feel REALLY guilty about what happened with that guy that I didn't tell him about.

Part of me says ..I've kept it from him for so long, why tell him now and fuck things up?

Then the other part says ..I love him so much and he deserves to know.

But I'm so afraid he won't believe me that I stopped having sex with the guy BECAUSE OF HIM. I mean, if he told me this story I don't know if I would believe hiim either.

And I'm afraid he will break up with me because of all this

Can someone help? Any advice??? :confused:

[xkingchangox]

I don't know you but I suggest you keep your mouth shut and your legs closed. You already FUCKED things up beyond repair. I my self have been a cheater and have come to terms with my mistakes, so should you.

Your relationship can't be saved by confessing. You have already as previously mentioned FUCKED it up. Why hurt your poor boy friend any more then you already have done with your selfish bullshit.

You don't want to confess to him because you feel bad for him, you want to do it to make your self feel better. Your relationship is doomed already and will probably fall apart from there.

The person I feel the worst for is the poor guy who was on vacation trying to have a good time and you fucked it up for him too.

[t0nythelover]

Originally posted by ladyshady

Okay. I'm gunna make this as short as I can.

I've been with my boyfriend for about 7 months. Now, I went away over the summer with a bunch of my girls. And at this time I wasn't really sure if I loved him or not, or how much I loved him, or how long this was gunna last. But I went on vacation with him in mind, and didn't want to cheat, and I'm not a cheating person at all. Well, that didn't happen and I wound up talking to a few guys. I mean, I made out with a few guys(and by a few I mean like 3, not 23 lol) during some really drunken nights at a club. (A little kissing doesn't hurt now does it?) And one time it ended up being a little more than innocent making out and this guy went down on me(no, not in the club lol) So me and that guy started haning. And well, the inevitable happened one night, we had sex. Well, sort of. We started to, but then I said I'm sorry I really can't do this I have a boyfriend. He was a cool guy and he understood, so we stopped.

Now when i came home, I told my boyfriend SOME of what happened. (i.e. making out with a few guys and the oral sex thing) He was a little upset but glad I told him right away and didn't lie to him.

Since then I have NEVER done ANYTHING with another guy. The thought has never crossed my mind. I really love this guy.

Now, months later, we've been together and things have been great. And I know he's never cheated on me and I feel REALLY guilty about what happened with that guy that I didn't tell him about.

Part of me says ..I've kept it from him for so long, why tell him now and fuck things up?

Then the other part says ..I love him so much and he deserves to know.

But I'm so afraid he won't believe me that I stopped having sex with the guy BECAUSE OF HIM. I mean, if he told me this story I don't know if I would believe hiim either.

And I'm afraid he will break up with me because of all this

Can someone help? Any advice??? :confused:

you should have told him then. its not fair. tell him everything now. if he doesnt beleive you its your fault and theres nothing you can do but let him find a nice girl who wont treat him so bad. otherwise if you keep hiding this your being unfair to him and you dont really love him

[ghhhhhost]

Originally posted by origskeemr

Aight, after reading everyones post here is my input. I think what you did is really fucked up but of course you already know that. If I were your boyfriend I would have fuckin spit in your face for fucking another man while I was wit you when I have never cheated on you. I mean wtf, do you know how hard it is to find a good boyfriend/girlfriend. I could understand if it was a hook up and you apologized as soon as you got home cause it would show that you made a mistake and were trustworthy, but a dude went down on you and another fucked you. As soon as you got back you should have broken up with him and said you realized shit while you were gone and that would have just showed you had a little amount of respect for him. However, I do see maybe you made the BIGGEST fuckin mistake in your life and didnt want to fuck yourself over which is selfish but whateva. To be quite frank I think he's fuckin whipped so it really wouldnt matter if you told him and explained yourself. The reason I say this is because he's still with you after another guy ate your pussy. I would have spit in your face for just that! However, thats just me and I'm a dick and have a lot of pride. I do think your a nice girl (well by CP) and you def made a big mistake if you truely love this guy, but maybe your young and just arent ready for a relationship yet. You just started your freshman year in college and I know I wasnt ready to be with ANYONE when I was starting college so I never pursued one just got ass. If you truely feel that you love this kid and fucked up BIG TIME then dont tell your boyfriend cause if he stays wit you then he's a psycho. You wouldnt really want that anyway cause in the long run your fucking yourself when you do wanna end it or realize shit. So keep it to yourself.

I hope this post didnt hurt you in anyway cause its just my way of thinking.

im with my coffee stained friend here...but i wouldnt spit in your face...ur not that low.

shady what ya did is some really f'd up shit...but if he 4gives u and is still willing to be with u then thank god for that....cause he's definitely more understanding than 90% of the population.

treasure what u have..if u feel the bond between u is strong then work on preserving it and forgetting the past..

one thing...i highly doubt hell ever forget what u did..forgive yeah...but forget never...

[origskeemr]

Originally posted by ghhhhhost

im with my coffee stained friend here...but i wouldnt spit in your face...ur not that low.

shady what ya did is some really f'd up shit...but if he 4gives u and is still willing to be with u then thank god for that....cause he's definitely more understanding than 90% of the population.

treasure what u have..if u feel the bond between u is strong then work on preserving it and forgetting the past..

one thing...i highly doubt hell ever forget what u did..forgive yeah...but forget never...

lol I took back the spitting part cause I was just mad thinking it was my girl. That would be my initial reaction, but then I thought about it and realized I dont think I could ever stoop that low. Then again if I ate my girl out after another man's dick was in there... whateva, I'm sure everyone would understand if it did happen. lol

[ladyshady]

[kaysersoze]

this thread is crazy... 'dear abby' couldnt hold a candle to cp love experts

[uncuthero]

you are a whore.

[tastey]

Originally posted by uncuthero

you are a whore.

:laugh:

[iamme]

Where is that first quote from in your sig?? cant put my finger on it

[origskeemr]

Originally posted by ladyshady

Well what happened? What did you decide to do? Kinda curious.

[marcomaxim]

You can NEVER be trusted.

I would throw you off a bridge.

Im just saying. YOUR FUCKED UP!!!

[nynyny]

that is so wrong. did the kid even wear a condom? how would you feeel if you gave your boyfrind HIV from some dirty kid that probably had his dick in 15 other girls that week/

i feel bad for your boyfriend..sounds like the kid doesnt deserve a free prostitute like you(although free is always good, but your free for other guys to fuck, your bf probably spends money on you).anyway let us know what happens this si like a sopa opera.lol

[sigmagal]

Originally posted by ladyshady

yeah, your right. but at the time I had only been with him for a little while and things weren't going that well. so i was kinda like just fuck it. i'm on vacation with my girls, im gunna have a little fun. now mind you, i didnt go crazy running around getting with every guy. i still knew i had a boyfriend.

and like i said in my first post, i'm not a cheater. I've never cheated on one of my boyfriends before, ever.

This is the part that disturbs me the most...

You didn't go crazy and run around getting with every guy... you kissed 3, gotten eaten out and had "a little bit of" of sex all while on vacation. How long were you gone for a week? Thisis after sying that you aren't a cheater . I can't imagine how much you would have done if you were a cheater.

Anyway as for what to do now... If you really care about his guy and you want to be with him you have to think about the long term. If this is goig to bother you and eventually come up later then just tell him. If you can live with it,then move on and forget about it. Be faithful and appriciate the man that you have found.

[pookie23]

You're too young to be "locked down" like that...go out and have fun...be single and ENJOY college and life!

[cubbie78]

Not to be judgemental...but I don't thik that you can honestly say that you are not a cheating person. You did infact cheat on him. I'm not saying that you are a bad person. I don't know you from a hole in the wall, but you did cheat. Everyone make mistakes, especially me, so please don't take this as an assault on your character.

As far as telling your man what happened...you have two choices. 1) Don't tell him because he will never trust you again. (and if he does...its because he is cheating on you!) In fact after a while, you won't trust him because you will think that he is trying to "even the score." However, how can you really love someone without being 100% honest! I know i couldn't because I would feel too guilty...but that is just a personal thing. If you wasnt to stay together...the best bet is to never tell him.

2) If you really love him and think that he is your soul-mate, then you have to tell him. IAgain, I don't know you or anything about your relationship, but I have the feeling that if he is your soul mate...you wouldn't have cheated in the first place.

Overall I think you should take the whole situation as a sign that realistically the two of you probably shouldn't be together. If things were to work out and you two were married, I think evenetually the cheating will re-enter your relationship.

Hope things work out for you!

Originally posted by ladyshady

Okay. I'm gunna make this as short as I can.

I've been with my boyfriend for about 7 months. Now, I went away over the summer with a bunch of my girls. And at this time I wasn't really sure if I loved him or not, or how much I loved him, or how long this was gunna last. But I went on vacation with him in mind, and didn't want to cheat, and I'm not a cheating person at all. Well, that didn't happen and I wound up talking to a few guys. I mean, I made out with a few guys(and by a few I mean like 3, not 23 lol) during some really drunken nights at a club. (A little kissing doesn't hurt now does it?) And one time it ended up being a little more than innocent making out and this guy went down on me(no, not in the club lol) So me and that guy started haning. And well, the inevitable happened one night, we had sex. Well, sort of. We started to, but then I said I'm sorry I really can't do this I have a boyfriend. He was a cool guy and he understood, so we stopped.

Now when i came home, I told my boyfriend SOME of what happened. (i.e. making out with a few guys and the oral sex thing) He was a little upset but glad I told him right away and didn't lie to him.

Since then I have NEVER done ANYTHING with another guy. The thought has never crossed my mind. I really love this guy.

Now, months later, we've been together and things have been great. And I know he's never cheated on me and I feel REALLY guilty about what happened with that guy that I didn't tell him about.

Part of me says ..I've kept it from him for so long, why tell him now and fuck things up?

Then the other part says ..I love him so much and he deserves to know.

But I'm so afraid he won't believe me that I stopped having sex with the guy BECAUSE OF HIM. I mean, if he told me this story I don't know if I would believe hiim either.

And I'm afraid he will break up with me because of all this

Can someone help? Any advice??? :confused:

[sexxyh]

if it is bothering u so much u have to tell him b/c it will eat u inside........i cheated on my ex of 3 and a half years after we went out for a year and a half.....i kissed a few guys (its a special situation he was gone for 9 months!!!!) anyways even though it was just kissing it made me feel so guilty when he came back but i was afraid he'd break up with me if i told him so i kept it in.....then when he asked me to marry him i said no b/c i couldn't go into marriage with him with all that guilt inside.........we've been broken up for 3 years now but it was only this summer that i told him that i cheated on him...........honestly i dont think the relationship can work out in the long run.......thats the consequence of cheating...thats why now if im in a realationship that can end up serious i just dont cheat...if i have an urge to cheat that means there is no point wasting time with this person............................my 2 cents

[ladyshady]

Originally posted by origskeemr

Well what happened? What did you decide to do? Kinda curious.

i took care of it

[origskeemr]

Originally posted by ladyshady

i took care of it

is all well?

[Guest gabo]

Originally posted by spragga25

You're too young to be "locked down" like that...go out and have fun...be single and ENJOY college and life!

good shit right there!

[uncuthero]

║¿so what happened?

[pookie23]

Originally posted by uncuthero

║¿so what happened?

look up a couple posts above you sherlock