Jump to content
Clubplanet Nightlife Community

Help!! I need advice!!


jjbubbles123

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 51
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

First make sure your ready don't get force into doing something you don't want to do.Then if your boy friend is older just go with the flow,let him lead just like dancing.Oh! and the number one thing ware PROTECTION!

------------------

"Smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Answer this question:

Do you love him or is he pressuring you to do this?

Is he saying things like, Your probably the last virgin out there? Everyone is doing it but you!

If you love him, and your ready to give yourself to someone mentally and physically, then go for it! You can't get that back!!!!

How long have you been with him?

I'm worried that he just wants to sleep with a virgin!!!!! Good luck and be SAFE!!!

------------------

Good time had by all!!!

[This message has been edited by glowgirl (edited 09-16-2000).]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

How old are you ? How old is he? How long you two been going out. Don't just have sex because he's pressuring you into it, and don't be afraid he'll leave if you don't have sex with him. If he does then he's a total piece of shit. Be careful and use protection. Don't let him talk you out of using protection.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

all the advice on here is great... except for roadrunners comment. I'm sure he/she is kidding... a pretty poor attempt to be funny...is that how your first experience went, roadrunner? cwm3.gif

------------------

"Come closer to the speakers so I can see the light in your eyes..."

[This message has been edited by egotrip94 (edited 09-18-2000).]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Girl, make sure he's really worth it. Why? believe it or not, you'll probably have several encounters in your life, but the first one will be the one that you'll probably never forget. Also, I agree with the previous post, use condoms. Sex is a beautiful thing and all, but sad that something like that could kill a person if not careful. Take care and hope you make the decision that's best for you. Yea you because the man is not the one who loses, it's you. I'm referring to your virginity just in case.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by dollabill25:

How old are you ? How old is he? How long you two been going out. Don't just have sex because he's pressuring you into it, and don't be afraid he'll leave if you don't have sex with him. If he does then he's a total piece of shit. Be careful and use protection. Don't let him talk you out of using protection.

when i said much younger..i ment much younger... im 13, and hes 20..even though we have only been going out for a little while, we have been really close friends for almost a year now. and hes not pressuring me, at first he was, but he backed off, which was when i realized i wanted to. he is very respectful to me, and i havent told him i want to yet so things havent changed or anything. but im begining to get confused with what all of you are saying!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

WTF!!!!! 13 and 20....that is fucked up besides being illegal as hell....i dont care what is goin on....i would wait till you are older....why can't he find someone his age...i am almost 20 and i would never even think of having sex with someone that was 13...i wouldnt even look at a 13 year old in that way....shit....

Mike.

------------------

"Clothes Minded?"--Kenneth Cole

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by jjbubbles123:

when i said much younger..i ment much younger... im 13, and hes 20..even though we have only been going out for a little while, we have been really close friends for almost a year now. and hes not pressuring me, at first he was, but he backed off, which was when i realized i wanted to. he is very respectful to me, and i havent told him i want to yet so things havent changed or anything. but im begining to get confused with what all of you are saying!

Excuse me, Teacher

LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE!

cwm44.gif

[This message has been edited by keanureeves (edited 09-18-2000).]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Remember - only you know if you're ready. Think it over carefully. It's a little crazy with regards to your ages. I have known people who did it at a younger age and have dealt with it fine - BUT - I have also known younger people that are in therapy because of it.

cwm19.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oopp!!!! Didn't read the age thing!!!! You should wait till you're at least 18!!!!! 13 is too young! I figured you were at least 18. Sorry for the wrong info!!!! And you're guy needs to get a grip! But even if you do hook up, you won't even feel the same about him a few months from now because you are still growin' up. Stay put sweety.... You're not ready yet. Trust me on that.

Penix!!!! I was 19 in '85!!!!

Peace smile.gif

[This message has been edited by Nestor (edited 09-19-2000).]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Nestor:

Virginity is overrated! You should have done this long ago. Having sex should be for you not the other person when you are ready. I guess cause I'm a guy I have this attitude. But if women are to be truly liberated they have to stop holding virginity as something that is so high and holy. It's not. It's basically a supression of your normal human instincts.

With that said I think that if you are really ready for it, then you should go for it. Relax. If he really cares about you, he will stop if you get uncomforatble. If he can't control himself, then he doesn't really care about you.

Being that it is your first time, you are going to be very nervous, it natural. Even he is going to be nervous because it's his first time with you. You may need a little KY if you intend to use protection. And what do guys like? Well, don't know what other guys like, but I like a women that is 100% in to me at that time. Don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. Be natural.

Thank goodness that my first time was 100% natural (no protection) back in 1985, before all the HIV crap. I feel sorry for everyone starting out now frown.gif

icon9.gif

how old were you in '85, Nestor?

------------------

signature.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow. 13!! Okay . . .my frist reaction would be to grab you and throw you in the closet and not letting you out until you're 16 AT LEAST!!

However, being that I'm NO ANGEL (besides my name) either, I can only give you a womanly advice. From one woman to another . . err . . . a girl, but WHATEVER!!

Like everyone has said before me . . . IT IS SO IMPORTANT that you know he loves you. ABSOLUTELY without a doubt. And I'll tell you why. It's not for some romantic sentimental reason either. There are TWO reasons why a virgin should only give her virginity to a man that ABSOLUTELY loves her.

1. Because if he loves you then he will make sure that you feel the least amount of pain possible. Breaking your virginity is going to hurt . . . no matter what you or he does. There's no avoiding it. HOWEVER, if he LOVES you (I mean REALLY loves you) then he's going to know this and will do everything he can to make sure that you don't feel more than you have to. IF he doesn't love you then he's not really going to think about the pain that you have to go through and your pain will be greater . . . MUCH greater!

2. Whether you guys work out in the future or not . . and I'm really not saying this to be condescending . . . but the chances are you guys won't work out cause you're only 13. But whether you guys do or not, it's gonna fell REAL good 10 years from now when you're 23 and know that you gave your virginity to someone that truly loved you instead of some asshole who didn't deserve it. You'll regret it less.

So, think REAL hard about whether or not he's the one. Cause a virginity is the one thing that we, girls, have that is TRULY our own. Give it to someone that deserves it!

And one more thing . . . you're NEVER too old to be a virgin. It's makes you more special. Good luck!

BlueAngel

------------------

"Do you believe in love at first sight or do I need to walk by again?"

angel.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

EXCUSE ME! IF HES 20 AND SHES 13 WE ARE TALKING ABOUT PEDOPHILIA AND STATATORY RAPE (OR WHATEVER U CALL IT IN NY)!!!

YOUR 20 Y.O. GUY IS A SICK FUCK. I DONT BUY ANY "I AM A MATURE 13 YEAR OLD" CAUSE YOU ARE NOT A WOMAN, YOU ARE A GIRL AND HAVING SEX WONT CHANGE THAT.

get away from this guy and hold your excitement in check. life is a pain in the ass sometimes. we all have to do things we dont feel like doing, and thatll neve change. u need to *wait* to get into bars, u need to *wait* to go to college or enter the so-called real-world, and u need to *wait* to have sex with a male somewhere in the vicinity of your age group. it is simply not healthy in our society for 13 year old girls to fornicate with 20 year old guys.

heres another way to look at it: HES A FUCKING LOSER. its not just sirdante's opinion, bc most people will agree with me. any adult male who chases 13 YO girls is a LOSER. do you want to grow up knowing that you have sex with LOSERS?

get away from this loser ASAP. his behavior is heinously unacceptable and illegal.

------------------

i love music!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

sirdante, I would agree with you 100%!! BUT . . . being that my mom was 16 when she met my dad who was 24 (8 years older). I can't really say much. cwm6.gif

You're right that normally people would look at the guy and say WTF, WHY a 13 yearold . . . but I guess we should leave room for doubt.

BlueAngel

------------------

"Live as if your were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever."

angel.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by blueangel:

sirdante, I would agree with you 100%!! BUT . . . being that my mom was 16 when she met my dad who was 24 (8 years older). I can't really say much. cwm6.gif

You're right that normally people would look at the guy and say WTF, WHY a 13 yearold . . . but I guess we should leave room for doubt.

BlueAngel

doubt nothing. the girl has barely reached puberty.

your mom was 16 not 13, thats two different ends of puberty. unlike adults, 3 years for pubescent teans is a major difference.

------------------

i love music!

[This message has been edited by sirdante (edited 09-19-2000).]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

to start, he wasnt chasing me, or any other 13 year old girls..it just kinda happend by mistake that we even became friends. second, dont start with hes a loser because you dont know him, and therefore you cant judge him. i made this post for helpful advice not criticism. maybe if you know me, or him, i could understand if you were criticizing me, but you wouldnt because you know the situations im in.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by jjbubbles123:

to start, he wasnt chasing me, or any other 13 year old girls..it just kinda happend by mistake that we even became friends. second, dont start with hes a loser because you dont know him, and therefore you cant judge him. i made this post for helpful advice not criticism. maybe if you know me, or him, i could understand if you were criticizing me, but you wouldnt because you know the situations im in.

i dont need to know him. its a fact that *any* adult male who hooks up with a 13 year old girl is a scumbag. love is one thing; sex is an entirely diferent issue.

now, i dont know your situation, but i know alot about the world we live in. i dont want to sound like an old man, but it is simply not possible that you have seen what i have seen or know as much as i know. you are way out of line to even begin to argue with me on this. i am not a big fan of law and order, but there is a *reason* why it is illegal for an adult male to have sex with a non-adult female.

i dont care if you didnt ask for criticism of your BF. he is beyond criticism. i am talking more about how guys like him should be punished and listed as sex offenders than about just saying hes a bad guy.

the guy is a piece of shit simply because he is 20 and is seducing a 13 year old girl! it is sick, wrong, sinful, illegal, irresponsible, and unethical to have sex with an immature person.

...i call you immature bc you are immature physically, emotionally you could be more mature than many 40 year olds. i dont know you...

i personally dont bow blindly to the laws of our government or organized religion or anything like that, but i can tell you that there is *no excuse* for pedophilia and statutory rape. its the lowest of the low. there is little worse on this planet than a pedophilliac.

and dont try to BS me with "it just kinda happend by mistake that we even became friends." that doesnt fly with me. i am an intellegent old man who knows that getting laid *never* just "happens." one way or another, without serious chemical or emotional distress, there is time to think about your actions. and if he is going to go through with it, hes a foul canker on the face of life. love can wait, getting off with a 13 year old girl isnt love. its disgusting.

you want advice: enjoy your fantasies. theyll enhance the real deal when the time comes. theres no hurry. even more guys will be around when you are 16 or 20 or 50 than when you are 13. please, please, let your fantasies develop for a few more years.

i absolutely promise you from the bottom of my good heart and the depths of my maturing mind that each year that you wait will make your adult sex life that much more fufilling. an adults life is different from that of a young adults life. personal and family issues are still with us, just like with you, but there's alot more. ignorance and virginity are two things that all teenagers are in a hurry to lose, but once theyre gone, you will never get them back.

believe it or not, many adults miss that bit of ignorance we once had as kids. it is the thing that made us feel so powerful when we were younger. once we became wise to the world, we became a bit sadder bc we realised we werent the immortal and all-knowing teenager we once thought we were. it is almost a forbodding feeling like once you accept adulthood, you accept death.

act like a girl, not a woman, cause you *are* still a kid. put off the adult bullshit for as long as possible. have some fun with your girlfriends and let the goofy guys your age chase you around (and damn it, they *need* girls their own age to figure out how to grow up; you owe it to them, theyre just silly human beings too you know).

all the kid stuff that you are trying to get beyond is much cooler than putting out for your adult boyfriend. having sex with this guy might make you feel older in many ways, but it is an immature thing to do. becoming older, especially without the perks of going clubbing and having the money to go on vacations and stuff, really sucks.

please tell your friend you cant see him anymore. tell him why. he must understand. if you have these urges, you make it too hard for him and you to be friends. i hope he doesnt have the same strong feelings about having sex with you as yo do for him. that would be wrong. if he cares about you he will understand. you two can work it out later, after you both get a chance to mess around some more with people your own age.

look, i stayed late at work today to write all of this because i care about people, so i care about you. i think having sex with this guy would be a big mistake. take care. have fun. but please, dont do it.

------------------

i love music!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by sirdante:

EXCUSE ME! IF HES 20 AND SHES 13 WE ARE TALKING ABOUT PEDOPHILIA AND STATATORY RAPE (OR WHATEVER U CALL IT IN NY)!!!

YOUR 20 Y.O. GUY IS A SICK FUCK. I DONT BUY ANY "I AM A MATURE 13 YEAR OLD" CAUSE YOU ARE NOT A WOMAN, YOU ARE A GIRL AND HAVING SEX WONT CHANGE THAT.

get away from this guy and hold your excitement in check. life is a pain in the ass sometimes. we all have to do things we dont feel like doing, and thatll neve change. u need to *wait* to get into bars, u need to *wait* to go to college or enter the so-called real-world, and u need to *wait* to have sex with a male somewhere in the vicinity of your age group. it is simply not healthy in our society for 13 year old girls to fornicate with 20 year old guys.

heres another way to look at it: HES A FUCKING LOSER. its not just sirdante's opinion, bc most people will agree with me. any adult male who chases 13 YO girls is a LOSER. do you want to grow up knowing that you have sex with LOSERS?

get away from this loser ASAP. his behavior is heinously unacceptable and illegal.

either that, or take your ass to another country

cwm43.gif

------------------

gohanssj2.gif

<I'm a Fire-starter>

--- When the Artful speaks

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

asthanos.gif

"Takin' out the suckas, and they don't know how I did it!!!"

munch.GIF

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...