Sin, I totally understand what you are saying. Me personally, I will ALWAYS have a special place in my heart for my 1st. But NOT because he was the guy I lost my virginity to. Because we were together for 3 years and he was my first everything.. That bond between people will never die in most cases. BUT.. There is a HUGE difference between loving someone from your past (passive) vs. loving someone right now (active). Passive love for past bf/gf which meant something special to you will never go away. It will always be there. Every "special" person in your life leaves a mark in your heart. Especially if you're as close to them as a bf/gf.. BUT, again, that does NOT mean that this passive love is taking away from your relationship. Not at all! It's very complicated if you ask me but at the same time it's very simple. He's with you. He loves you. No matter what happened before. Of course he has his memories and feelings but who doesn't? Thinking the way you do will drive you crazy. Take it easy on yourself and enjoy it, not try to find a reason for doubts and uncertainties.. I honestly hope that you don't let these thoughts ruin anything with your bf. Everyone has a past. But it doesn't matter. Like I said before, if you guys are good together, nothing can change that. Not an exgf, not 10 exgf's..